Introducing Myself

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by BoogiesMama, May 19, 2010.

  1. BoogiesMama

    BoogiesMama Guest

    Hi everyone, I'm new here and glad I found this site and hoping to learn a lot from the things I read and advice I know I will ask for along the way.

    I am no stranger to adhd and depression- both myself and my oldest have both. And due to my difficulties when my oldest was younger my dad ended up taking him from me and raising him so I didn't have much experience with dealing with his issues.

    And now, my youngest comes along, and boy what a handful. At 12 months I knew it was not going to be easy, and it hasn't been. I recently to him to a neuropsychologist and he's been diagnosed with adhd and odd, and I've been told that there is probably more to come but that due to his age, some of it won't be seen until he grows a little older.

    I'm struggling with this all. Most of the stuff I read online or in books is not meant for a kid his age, some of the stuff won't work on a 2 year old.

    I will be starting some therapy myself soon to learn new methods of dealing with him, although the doctor says that due to his high level of hyperactivity and impulsiveness, it wil only be marginally effective without some medication.

    I am not crazy about that idea due to his age, but I have to do something. His behavior is dangerous and exhausting. I have a great dog, let me tell you! My son has cut his ear with scissors, he bites the dog, kicks him, hits him, jumps on him while he's sound asleep and is just all around rotten to him at times... and they love each other dearly. My dog is a 7 year old pitbull I rescued when he was 9 months old from a very abusive background that included broken bones.. and for him to put up with what he does from this kid amazes me. They are inseperable!

    My son is also into electrical outlets, opening the front door whenever the mood strikes him and taking off outside, basically just whatever he wants. He wiped out an entire fish tank of baby cichlids I had been raising from eggs after climbing the book shelf and getting the fish food and dumping the whole giant container in the tank when I was in the bathroom. One fish survived the ordeal.

    I'm exhausted! He stays up until about 4 a.m. every day and from the minute he wakes up in the morning it is non-stop action-no naps or down time. I rarely get more than a few minutes to myself each day!

    if anyone has ideas of how to deal with things, I am open to hear them. I try to do craft projects with him and that is okay for a few minutes and then he destroys whatever we just made. I try to play with his matchbox cars with him, but that only lasts a minute. Reading is a joke, we get through about 1/2 a page. He is super intelligent and picks up on things quickly, but I can't keep him focused on anything.

    I have had a little success with gardening with him. He loves to plant the seeds. I've done some cat grass seeds with him so they would sprout quickly and he is loving watching it grow so fast.

    Sorry this is so long, I think along with introducing myself I also needed to vent! :anxious:
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi. I'm very sorry you had to be here, but the people here are really nice.

    How is your son's speech and eye contact and will he cuddle with you? Does he have any unusual mannerisms such as rocking back and forth or banging his head or scratching himself or making weird mouth or throat noises or lining up his toys. How are his motor skills. Does he interact appropriately with his peers? Does he cover his ears for loud noise, will he not wear certain fabrics, is he sensitive to crowds and noisy places? Can he transition from one activity to another without any problem? Did your oldest, whom you also had trouble with, have any of these issues, such as extremely poor socialization?

    does his biological father have any issues? Remember, even if he's never seen the man, he carries 50% of his genes, thus can inherit his issues.

    You need to call your school district to get him into Early Childhood interventions. They help a lot and also give you a break. The earlier you start, the better the prognosis. My son was just like yours, and he's very mellow now (at sixteen), but he got services at a very young age. These differently wired kids do not respond well to "normal" or tradional behavioral methods. I would take him to a neuropsychologist. He is very young, but you can be pointed in a more clear direction than you have been. Unfortunately, most of our kids start out with that ADHD/ODD diagnosis and it usually changes. But a neuropsychologist is a little bit sharper because he/she tests from 6-10 hours.
  3. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Welcome, boogiesMama. It sounds like you've got your hands full.

    You'll find a lot of understanding parents here.
  4. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Definitely call the school, they provide early intervention services and evaluations free of charge.

    Have you tried all of the non-medicine interventions? They each work for some kids and not others.

    1. Limit diet to all natural foods that do not contain gluten or caesin. (If this works, it tends to work very well.)

    2. Eliminate all screens (no tv, computer, video games).

    3. Have a rigid schedule. At his age you can create a picture list of the things you are going to do. Sometimes the schools will help with this. We had a strip on velcro on a poster board and a bunch of different pictures of possible activities. Post them the night before for the next day and then each time you complete and activity, have him take the picture down and go to the next one. Be very consistent on nap time and bedtime, keep him in bed at night. Enough sleep (at his age 11-12 hours/day) is key.

    4. I am surprised that the psychiatrist is suggesting medicating a 2 year old. He must be such a handful. ((hugs))). With you having bipolar, there is a chance that he has it as well. Be very cautious about any stimlant use, it could make things worse if this is early onset bipolar.

    Have you read "The Out of Sync Child" or "The Bipolar Child"?
  5. tictoc

    tictoc New Member

    I'm going to guess that your son might have sensory issues, in addition to whatever else is going on. Many of the kids here do have sensory issues. An occupational therapist evaluates for this, though many school OTs are not big on the sensory stuff.

    Anyway, I recommend the book, "The Out-of Sync Child Has Fun," by Carol Stock Kranowitz. It has lots of fun ideas to do with kids who are on the go all the time. My son and I benefited a lot from this book because it gave us so many things to do.

    Good luck.