I've got to adjust.

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Abbey, Aug 8, 2008.

  1. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    I'm learning...albiet slowly.

    I've learned that I can't drive 45. Max is 25mph here and there are LOTS of police. (Geez...world center of crime here in Oshkosh.)

    I've learned that people...family, neighbors, etc., will just pop in your door at any time. Be prepared. Even if you lock, they all have keys.

    I've learned that I can't go have my morning smoke on the patio naky. (Won't go there, but was caught this morning.)

    I've learned that family is family. I went to my husband's Aunt's house yesterday to do two loads of laundry. Well...it took a time to dry, so I said I'd be back today. Go back, and it is impressbily folded and hung. I was like...Shoot!! I'm never doing laundry again!!

    Such a slower pace of life. I think I'll go take a nap.

  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Well it is now that YOU live there!

    You've seen one ash, you've seen 'em all...

    You're just exhausted from all the excitement... be careful -- pace yourself!
  4. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Yeah. Guys from next door just rolled in as I'm on my patio (clothed for once...I'm learning). I get this little wave...Hey! Wanna come over for a beer? Naw...I'm doing laundry. (Absolute lie. I don't even have a washer and dryer.)

    Next thing I know I'll be on YouTube like that freaky guy with the claw hammer and motor oil. Still can't get that out of my mind.

  5. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    The police are everywhere cause they have nothing else to do.

    Go naky. You'll start a revolution in Oshkosh.

    Laundry folded and hung??? I'm moving in.

    I'd still be changing the locks, though. That just creeps me out.
  6. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    (stuffs laundry in a box marked for OshKosh) :tongue:

    Sweet - you HAVE a washer and dryer and STILL someone is washing your clothes? YOU SO ROCK! :bow:
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    OMG! LOL.

    So, you really sat on the porch naked and smoked?

    No wonder everyone is so nice to you. You are their only entertainment. :)
  8. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Yeah, got to learn about a few things.

    There are NO fences. Remember that next time you go out for a smoke. (husband would clock me upside the head.) I'm sitting outside today and the guys come home. Wanna beer? Naw...doing laundry. (Total lie as I don't have a washer and dryer.) I think they're watching to see if I have a smoke again.

    I've lived on my spaghetti for 4 days. Got to love a crock pot.

    ALL neighbors have keys. Nuff' said.

    MIL1 and father in law are off to the 'woods' (Wisconsonites would know where that is) for a week. YEAH!! I just get to take care for the cat from hell. This cat literally attacks you. I think she thinks she is a lion or something. No, dear...YOU'RE JUST A PLAIN CAT!!

    MIL2 gave me some clothes today from the Depression Era. I swear these shorts go up to my boobs. But, I put them on with pride. Actually, humiliation, but it worked. She folded my clothes, so I have to give back in some manner. It's the simple things you do for others. ;)

    Adjust, adjust, adjust.

  9. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    But, you had no clothes, dear, or you surely wouldn't have been sitting outside nekky, now would you?

    by the way- I'm with Star- our laundry will be there the first of the week. I don't care if it is sent back folded, hanging, or in a clump. If it has been washed, I am a happy camper out at the woods!!
  10. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: gasp :rofl:

    I've got a covered patio and privacy fence and I can't say that I've EVER gone out for my morning ciggie all warm, fuzzy from sleep and nekky. I think I would have paid to see you get caught! (sorry but it's funny!)

    Laundry finished and folded....check.
    Men off in the wilderness....check.
    Lots of bored cops....check.
    People walk right in...check.

    Yep........looks like you're in the midwest dear. (Check the hospital around 2 am. Sometimes our local third shift cops go there for coffee. Unless it's a weekend. Then they are staking out the bars)

    Everyone knows or is related to everyone else. Have a death in the family or something that will require neighbors to bring food and the first casserole will appear almost before you get off the phone with the second call. Sometimes I swear people keep stuff like that frozen and on hand just in case.


  11. Andy

    Andy Active Member

  12. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    The driving at 25 mph would be really hard for me to take...I'm from California, where speed limits are suggestions.

    Everyone having keys? Oh, no...I would say get a killer dog, but it sounds like you have access to a killer cat, so that might work as well.

    Did you bring your music with you? Since you've already been caught "au natural", maybe you need to install an exercise pole on the porch and dance for the guys next door. I'm sure you'd be the hottest thing in history to hit Wisconsin!
  13. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    Dang it all. This cat is a venom. Evil thing. Just went to let it out...I have a new scrar on my hand. I swear he thinks he's a tiger. He's going back in and not coming out for the next few days. Figure it out, kitty. Darn cat. I want to drop kick it. In fact, I think I will.

    I love it KT. Speed limits are suggestions. Not here. There is a cop every couple of miles. Guess it's a slow day in Oshkosh. Geez...I'm going 30 instead of 25. Arrest me. Please, take me in for respite from my inlaws.

    The cop would be..."I know, I know. Just get in the car and get some rest."

  14. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    Welcome to the neighborhood. We midwesterners know everything. We can almost remind each other that the other one is out of TP. Never having been in the others house. We know.

  15. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    They should go well with your granny panties that go up to your boobs too!

    (In my best scolding voice) Which you should have been wearing this morning, young lady!
  16. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Abbey, Another thing we midwesterners like to do is to "borrow" things. Especially an ingredient to finish a well started dish - Keep a cup of sugar and a few eggs on hand. Especially during snowstorm days when getting to the store is a little more difficult (I have even borrowed syrup to one neighbor and cold medicine to another and a can of soup to another).

    You are also allowed to borrow anything for cooking/baking, household projects, lawn care, and vehicle needs. You know - ladders, lawn mowers, tillers, whatever. Very neighborly to share!

    Let us know the first item you borrow out and the first item you ask to borrow.
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Remember to borrow a claw hammer and some motor oil! Print out the smoking gun website and tack that on your porch...lmao.

    I would keep some cans of crisco...ala shortening or lard, flour and sugar, eggs, dried milk or canned milk, and plenty of soup in your pantry for staples to share.

    Hey....maybe mother in law has a nice old fashioned house dress she can give you to make the nekky situation more tolerable. Just slip into one of those and you are almost nekky!
  18. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    When you slap on Janet's mumu, maybe you can grab some curlers to go with it...

    OMG, this is funny.

    Yeah, Abbey, welcome to the midwest. I'm surprised all the neighbors have keys. Around here, you either don't lock, or have a coffee can with allt he keys in it on the shelf beside the door....
  19. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Abbey-Be glad you aren't a half hour away in Rosendale. We have to drive through it to Green Bay and the speed limit is 30 but they have been known to ticket for going less than 5 mph over that. They sell a t-shirt that says, "I got the ticket in Rosendale" or something to that effect.

    Here in our part of the state it's not quite so bad. I remember when I first moved here over 20 years ago and my friend said I had to drive faster than the speed limit-it was expected!
  20. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Yes- and a pair of old simple house slippers kept by the door make it so easy to slip out on the deck whenever you feel like it.