Just When I Think Things Are Getting Better

[pasajes4]

My son is currently going into week 3 of a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) stay. I really thought we were making progress. This has been a horrible school year with truancy, suspensions, getting arrested, and so much more. Friday night he was able to make connections between his use of marijuana and all the mess he has been in. Yesterday, it all went out the window when he said that he had been thinking about our conversation on Friday and that really it was all my fault. If I would just let him and his friends smoke weed in the house, then he would not have to skip school and risk getting arrested and if I would buy it for him he would not have to steal to get it. So you see mom it's all your fault.



What a load of guappo. I want off the wheel please.

 

[buddy]

Darn these kids! having similar issues with cause/effect here too... I hope the staff there can help him sort through this out. He probably is making progress but when he gets in a place where he is craving it, maybe he then starts coming up with excuses??? I don't know, just wondering....

 

[toughlovin]

Oh gosh it is so ridiculous it is almost funny, except that he is serious. Well at least with that logic you know that it is not all your fault. He is in denial of his problem, which is pretty typical at this stage.... and it is good that you now know that is what is going on in his head.

However it is hard to deal with. Hang in there.

TL

 

[exhausted]

I'm so sorry. It seems to be the theme that they blame everyone. Will he go for some kind of treatment? Will the courts order daytreatment for him?

 

[enzo]

we get that too..."if only you'd let me smoke a little bit...". Stay firm. "Marijuana = bad things happening to you. Its nobody's fault but your own."

 

[Signorina]

Add us to the list of parents who get the blame...and it would be funny if it didn't hurt so much and it wasn't do ludicrous!

Holding your hand and sending support. Stay strong.

 

[Tiredof33]

There is so much pot on TV now that I think teens actually think it is cool and OK. I know their are successful people that can use it recreationally but I don't think it's OK for teens. I know too many adult pot heads that are now in their late 40's and 50's, don't use any more, but are not motivated to do anything except couch surf.

I have a step relative that has a BA and only works selling in a flea market on the weekends. He says he blames his problems on his pot use. I think he is just plain lazy and is a big time mooch. He is almost 50 and still would be living with his dad.

It doesn't affect everyone like that, but neither does alcohol. My 33yo son is so immature and I blame it on drugs and alcohol. I saw him clean and sober for a year and it was like night and day!!

And I am way over the guilt, there is no way to change the past. I tell mine it is your choices that have put you where you are today. It is very hard, but you deserve a life too, one that doesn't include supporting adult kids for the rest of your life.

(((blessings to us all)))

 

[pasajes4]

I went to visit last night and he very quickly escalated because I reimded him that when he goes home on pass he will still be on probation. He will have a 7:00 curfew and so on. Well that just tipped the scales for him. He stood up in the dining room screaming and cursing at me and when I would not respond he threw a chair at the window. The window did not break and no one got hurt. He is now restricted to the unit and will not get his pass. I will not be visiting any time soon. I do not want him to come home. I just don't feel safe.

 

[buddy]

good, he is not ready and you are not safe. Glad he did it there and not at your house! hugs to you, take a bubble bath and try to relax a little.... sorry for the hard times.