Just when I thought I was going to be ok...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by StillStanding, Dec 7, 2017.

  1. StillStanding

    StillStanding Active Member

    I've been trying to get ODSP (SSI) for my son. Where I live, you qualify if you have a mental illness or learning disability or addiction, etc. Since my son has all 3, you would think he could just get medical proof and move on. Don't get me wrong, I don't think the government should pay for everyone who just doesn't want to work but right now my son CAN NOT keep a job (and he's not even actively using).

    We have been going through this process for months. And, now the psychologist advises me that ODSP has asked him for more information. He doesn't even know how he could possibly provide more information. He's given them the educational assessment, his diagnosis, his findings, evidence of attempting suicide...

    I think his application is going to be denied.

    I didn't know it was possible to be this tired.

    Thanks for listening.
  2. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    Oh Still I am so sorry to hear this. I am sending all the good energy I can to make this application work out for your son.

    Big hugs!
  3. Crayola13

    Crayola13 Active Member

    You'll have to get an attorney. In my state, they always deny people over and over again unless they are paralyzed from the neck down.
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  4. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    where i live there are law offices (one is called disability rights) that handle applications, reapplications and appeals. they take a percentage of backpay on approved applications, as i understand it, with nothing up front. kind of like a contingency arrangement.

    i am not recommending them but something like this is one option.

    i could not say if it would be better to let this application play out, or to contact them now. if it was me i might wait until i received a denial before contacting an attorney.

    it might be he is accepted.

    i so do understand how agonizing is this process. the constant worrying and the sense it never stops.

    know that you are not alone.

    and you are...still standing.

    sending love and prayers
  5. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Hi SS, my thoughts and prayers are with you on this hard, hard road. Prayers going up for your continued strength. You are not alone.
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  6. so ready to live

    so ready to live Active Member

    SS. I know the SSI app. nightmare up close and personal. My son is somewhat similar to your son. It was a long haul to get disability, to keep it, to reapply after losing it. Hoops to jump through, you can do it though. Don't look for trouble, I agree with Copa, wait and see how it plays out. We were told once (in the US) that a denial is easier to fight due to you then know the grounds of refusal, and can focus on those specifically.
    You are stronger than you think. Find just a minute and be kind to you today. Hugs.
  7. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet


    Sorry that you are going through these hurdles.

    Sending you positive thoughts for the outcome you would like.

    I love your signature "these are his struggles, but they do not define who he is".

    If you knew how often I think of these words, you would be in shock...

    I find myself defining our son more and more by this. I hate it and I want to make it stop.
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am sorry you are struggling. Have you ever taken the time to go through ALL the records that you have, from as far back as you can find them, and make a timeline of what happened when, and how it impacted his life and his functioning on a daily basis?

    I am suggesting this for a reason. About 15 years ago my mom had a breakdown. It was both mental and physical. She became unable to do her job, or even go past the university where she worked without having real problems. She couldn't even answer the phone because she gave students her phone number. It might be a student or a coworker calling her. She ended up going out on leave from her job and needing to file for disability. Hard as it may be to believe, it is actually harder to get disability than it is to get SSI.

    My mother made a timeline like this, and had medical records to back up everything she listed. She never tossed anything from a doctor's office and always insisted on copies of test results and records from each visit even way back then when doctors did NOT give patients that information. Her doctors gave that info to her because it is easier to give it to her than to argue with her over it.

    It is just unheard of to get disability, especially full disability, the first time you apply. My mother got it. She had records of surgeries and problems that most people would have retired with ten or twenty years earlier than she did. She didn't even realize it was an option. She wasn't old enough to retire, in her mind. She did a complete list of records, and an easy to understand timeline of when each problem hit, with documentation.

    I don't know what the lawyers submit, but this worked very well. My mom was told it would be at least 3 months before she got an answer. She got an answer in about 6 weeks. She was given full disability.

    All you can do is the best you can do. If they deny the claim for SSI, get an attorney. Know that the denial is NOT about your son's health not being that bad. It is about a system being set up to be that awful. The system is set up to feed the lawyers, not to help the people who need it. So you will need a lawyer. Ask around if you can, see what people say about various law firms. Once you get a lawyer, stop worrying. Let the lawyer handle it.

    Please realize that any denial is not about your son. It is about a system that seems set up to pretty much deny most claims the first time. I am sorry this is so difficult for you. It is a truly awful system to navigate, especially the first time.
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  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Susie gave stellar advice. You need a paper trail...i did this.

    These days our "caring" politicians don't want us to get Disability. It is harder to get approval. You need proof you are disabled from as many doctors as you can. Not therapists. Doctors. Psychiatrists. A neuro psycholigist (phD) worked well too for my autistic son. School helped too.
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2017
  10. StillStanding

    StillStanding Active Member

    Thank you all for your kind words and advice.

    You're all right. It's so helpful to get input from people who aren't emotionally involved.

    I will wait to see if they actually reject him and then get legal advice. It's so hard to be patient when he's sick and homeless. I haven't been documenting everything and there are other doctors so while I'm waiting I'll start a file.

    Thanks again. You are all helping me to stay standing.
  11. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I am surprised to hear that addiction is a qualifier for SSI. When I talked to an attorney that specialized in helping people get SSI, he said my daughter's addiction would keep her from qualifying. He said that even if she had a mental illness, once they found out she was an addict, they would automatically deny her claim since they wouldn't be able to tell if it was the mental illness or addiction that kept her from being able to hold down a job.

    It turned out that she could function just fine once she got sober so I guess in her case they were right.

    I hope it all works out for your son. I have heard that most people are turned down the first time and that you have to be persistent.

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  12. StillStanding

    StillStanding Active Member

    ODSP is the Canadian version of SSI. It's not exactly the same. Addiction wasn't always a criteria but it is currently.
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