My son is still doing good.

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Copabanana, Mar 17, 2016.

  1. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    My son has been working with M to remodel a fixer upper we just bought. The idea had been to rent the front house and to fix up an apartment for him which is over the detached garage.

    It has been two weeks or so that this plan has been unfolding. There have been ups and downs but mostly ups.

    I just called M again because I wanted to know how my son was working. These are M's words (translated from the Spanish):

    He's working hard. I told him to take a break and he refused. Man, he's doing well.

    He has been staying with us and it is going better. Way better than I would have imagined. OK. My house does smell like marijuana and moldy orange peels. (My son said it is from his backpack. I let it rest.)

    Will be back.


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    Last edited: Mar 17, 2016
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Stick an open box of baking soda where he stores that backpack. At least it will keep the smell down in your house.

    Otherwise... wow! I'm sure you never imagined this a year ago.
  3. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Oh keep sharing this good news, it is very inspiring. I am happy for you Copa.
    Moldy orange peels and all.
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  4. Childofmine

    Childofmine one day at a time

    Great news! So glad for you, M and HIM! I pray it continues. #onedayatatime
  5. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    That is for sure, Insane. I came here desperate. I knew no other way than either throwing him out or micromanaging his life. I would never have imagined this for me, let alone him.
    It offers hope, nothing more than that. Hope that another day can be good.
    Yes. If I do not get ahead of myself and us, and keep my expectations in my own head, about my own self, I will be able to stay more present. I am trying to be responsible for me.

    M sent him home at 3pm because he had been hard at work steadily since 7am. It is not only the working that has my head spinning, it is the trying to conform here at the house. (You remember. I did not want him here. It was only when he seemed to want to work with us, that I relented.)

    Of course, I cannot find one thing in my kitchen. He puts things away "wherever" and dishes are half washed. But the trying to dominate by his presence, the insolence and disrespect is largely gone, except for when he is hurt he will retaliate but I do that too.

    We have a part of our house that that has its own exit door, bathroom and can be closed off. I even thought for a few minutes of offering him that space, instead of the soon to be remodeled apartment (I hope.) I do not think that is a good idea for any of us, but the idea I thought of it is incredible. Thank you for your support.

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  6. Roxona

    Roxona Active Member

    Yay for another great day!!! :likeit:
  7. Albatross

    Albatross Well-Known Member

    Great! Day by day. Keep sharing!