Need to rant

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by tictoc, Oct 9, 2009.

  1. tictoc

    tictoc New Member

    Bug's social skills teacher is at it again...Today Bug's aide told me that the teacher told her that she is not allowed to note his tics or frustration level in his communication log because she "is not qualified" to judge these things. Yes, the teacher is the same person who tried to implement tic therapy a few weeks ago, so I don't think she is at all qualified to tell someone else that they are not "qualified."

    Bug's aide is absolutely amazing...She is loving, kind, and truly "gets" him. She is one of the brightest spots in our world. Her notes on his frustration level and his tics are very helpful to us. I hate to start (another) fight with the teacher, but I'm going to have to.

    Why do things like this always have to come up on Friday??? Now I will fret about this all weekend.
  2. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Ugh. What a tool.

    Ok um....just thinking out loud here you think it would accomplish anything if the AIDE went to the Special Education dept. head and asked questions? I don't want her to get in trouble but maybe having things questioned on the inside would do more.

    And I have to is not noting his frustration level of any help? Wouldn't that be something you would WANT to a parent OR teacher, so that you can focus on the cause? (And are the tics sometimes related to this?)

    As for the tics.....well, at least she's not disciplining him for them but it sounds like she still doesn't get it.

  3. TPaul

    TPaul Idecor8

    Sending big boxing gloves your way, go get her!!!
  4. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Wow... it's sounds like this teacher is all about tit-for-tat. I can't believe she'd put difficult child's well-being in the middle. Personally, I wouldn't push too hard because I'd hate to see his aide re-assigned. I'd just quietly figure out a way for the aide to let you know what's up with difficult child. :winks:
  5. rlsnights

    rlsnights New Member

    I think I would call your Special Education district contact and inquire whether the SD has a policy about communication between school and home that in fact supports the teacher's position. It may be one of those things where the teacher is taking advantage of a policy that's in place but rarely enforced. If not then you could consider taking it to the social skills teacher's supervisor.

    I would also be documenting all these little revenges as much as possible. A little note in the communication log on that day saying "teacher no longer allows aide to complete communication form" or something less blatantly antagonistic for example. Lets the teacher know you're watching, marks that day in the calendar for you, and gives you a point of reference should the quality or quantity of information coming home change significantly. I'd photocopy that page before you send the log back to school. Depending on the degree of animosity from the teacher, you might want to photocopy the whole darn log in case it gets "lost".

    Hopefully you have an IEP meeting soon. If so, I'd write it into his IEP that aides are required to complete the communication log daily (or whatever) and the teacher should make additional comments as needed. If you use some kind of worksheet type of form for recording frustration level and # tics, you could make two columns for each one - the Teacher column and the Aide column. :D

    THAT could be very interesting info don't you think?

    Alternatively you could put it that you want to "relieve" the teacher of the "burden" of this daily "chore" since you know how very overworked the teacher is with all those children in her class. Therefore you would like to suggest that the Aide fill out the form with the teacher adding comments as necessary. Then write it into the IEP.

    One additional thought that may stick in your craw. Perhaps a thank you note and basket of homemade brownies or some other small gift may help soothe this teacher's ruffled feathers. The note could praise her skills (hopefully she does have some redeeming virtues) and let her know that you wanted to reduce her burden by having the aide do the communication log. You know how very hard she works, yada yada yada.

    I have done this once with a teacher that could not speak to me when I came in the door because she was so angry with me. Of course she was taking it out on my kids in subtle ways like sending them to sit and work outside by themselves as punishment for the most minor of infractions. It actually did work to some extent.