well, i found this site looking for info on ODD & Conduct Disorder information. Not really straight on all the abbreviations you all use, but totally understand the difficult child one. Hmmm, where do i begin, i guess the beginning. I always knew my little difficult child would be a force to be reckoned with, but from an early age, she knew how to manipulate a situation and take the "heat" off her. When she was about 7 a smart psychiatric told be to hold on & buckle up cuz it was gonna be one heck of a ride. They used the word back then as "the exceptional child". by 5th grade everything was everyone elses fault, by 7th grade she was bullying, 8th grade was WWI. 8th grade WWI started, cursing; bad friends; bad and self destructive behavior, we put our foot down. difficult child's counter attack was to accuse me of child abuse, after 3 weeks changed her mind, hid all correspondence and intercepted all phone calls. One day when i took a mental health day from work, a knock at teh door and it was protective services asking why i was ducking them, anyway long story short on this, they beleived me, saw all the evidence on why she was punished, confronted difficult child who then claimed she wanted to kill herself and got a one way trip into the local mental health hospital for 7 days. She became remorseful and was fairly good. OH, the best part on this, yet another doctor said, well, she's ok, borderline ODD but will grow out of it, no medications needed, you will all be fine, you have a strong marriage and togehter will be good.....DISCHARGED. Now flash to 2 1/2 years later. difficult child in 11th grade, was offered a college scholarship if she got 3.0 GPA for next 2 years to one of the best art schools. husband got really good job in the last year and i just started a new one in 04/07. All was pretty good, difficult child was trying to push our buttons but together it was all under control then husband got the news he was being deployed to Iraq. The beginning of WWII: difficult child kept all under control until she knew for a fact he was over there. The last 3 mos have been a nightmare. self destrucitve, bad friends, sweet boyfriend did a 360 and turned into a horrid boyfriend towards me and easy child and then the threats and walking on egg shells started. Flash forward to december and no more could i tolerate being cursed at, threatened, swung at etc....i put my foot down. took cell phone away and computer away. then my wonderful difficult child ran away. 4 days to find her. yet another one way ticket to the local mental health hospital. this time her stay was 10 days. I was advised ODD, bipolar tendencies, mood disorder. she didnt even follow rules there and the one time i did visit her once social worker left teh cursing at me and the foul name calling started again. Basically at discharge they gave me a prescription for her, said follow up with- a doctor and call this tx center to start teh process cuz she should be in a different environment. Sent her to her grandparents, that lasted 24 hours then she started threatening them and cursing them. Now she is with me and husband friends. at first they allowed her on teh computer and phone to talk to boyfriend and friends; even though husband and I said no. 10 days later (today) they advised me no more cuz they checked up on her and she is planning to have me hurt, but no real proof cuz she didnt use my name. i have withdrawn her from school but dummie me, still keeping up with that orthodontist (the friend takes her). I love my kid but after seeing her today and the same language and threats i cant do this. its a long process to get into a treatment center. i am afraid she will send the "gang" to me, she wants no help, doesnt think she needs any. My gosh, its my child, she is only 16 and i have lost her. i do tell the easy child's that the behavior is not appropriate and such and they are frightened of her cuz they have seen her curse at me and swing on me. which then opened the flood gates to what was going on when i was at work and husband overseas. i was floored to say the least. i mean the easy child wound up with pneumonia (105 degree temp, no exaggeration) never knew why, she didnt tell me why until difficult child was gone that difficult child would lock easy child out of the house when difficult child boyfriend came over and went upstairs and she would tell them she would tell on them and they put her out. its so crazy. there are so many laws against parents. if i put her out is that child abandonment? If i keep her around its cruel and unusual punishment to myself and easy child. i wanna beleive there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but i'm thinking its an amtrak train headin right for me. I am afraid to see what WWIII would be. any advice?