Two brooms is here. She just showed up. Since she is here, we are eating in the living room. So far she has asked easy child 2/difficult child why she's let herself get so fat, and has yelled at the dogs 3 times (neither of which jump on people, they just came close to her), and yelled at the Jack Russel who was sitting beside easy child 2/difficult child looking at her plate (not offering to eat it - just looking) from across the room. Woman. We have it under control. Ugh. I think I liked it better when she didn't visit!