Hello all. First I want to say that I read every response to both my posts regarding my visit with my daughter. I thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for all of the support and prayers given. The words "Thank you" just do not express how much gratitude I hold for you. The fact that you were willing to share your very personal experiences on this site just to help me cope, touches my heart a great deal. It means so much to me.
On to my visit. She wasn't ready to talk about it. I didn't mention it at all and neither did she. Her therapist made a special trip to the school today to support both of us. She is absolutely amazing. She should be the example to all therapists!!! Anyway, as we were pulling up to the school my sister had to pull the car over because as soon as I saw the driveway I lost it!! I had a panic attack, couldn't catch my breath, my entire body shook and I thought I was gonna be sick. My sister, my hero, calmed me down and told me to pull it together, my daughter needed me. I was able to get back into control after just a few minutes. When we got there my daughter was very angry. Clearly manic. For the first half hour or so, she was ranting and raving and cursing up a storm. She calmed down after her therapist arrived, then we went on to have a pretty good visit. We had lunch, well they had lunch. I was too nervous to eat. I was just waiting for her to drop the bomb. She never did. I know that she needs to talk to me about it, but listening to you all, I knew not to push the issue. I will be ready for her when she is ready. I did have many concerns regarding her medications. She is only on concerta, lexapro and geodon. Nothing as far as a mood stabilizer. She has been on almost all of them in the past. We haven't mastered that piece of the puzzle yet. The dr. seems to think she is not bipolar just conduct disorder. No way!!! She went from raging to smiles in a split second. It was so evident. I told her therapist I want her on new medications immediately. It is not fair to her to leave in her in this state. How can they expect her to function. She wants to come home on a weekend vist, but they wont let her because she is not stable. DUH!!! Not without her medications she's not. So she will be seeing the dr. on Tuesday. I think she needs to get off the concerta as it only aggitates her. She likes the concerta because it keeps the weight off and helps her to stay focused, but it makes her miserable. I have seen alot of you say the same thing about concerta. Forget the ADHD, I think stabilizing the bipolar is more important. We left the visit on a good note. I'm so glad for that, I hate leaving her when she is sad and crying. She gave me a flower that she planted for me in a beautiful flower pot that she painted sunflowers on. She knows that's my favorite flower. We brought her new clothes and sneakers and of course that perked her mood right up!!! So all's well that ends well. (for now)
The whole time I was thinking of all of you. Thinking about all of the advice and support you have given me. I couldn't wait to get home and tell all of you how the visit was. This site has really made a difference in my life.
So when she is ready I will be a mess, but I will be strong for her. Like you said, this has happened to her not me and she needs me. Hearing from those of you that share in this horror, I now know better what to say and what not to say. Thank you for that. I will keep you posted.
Wishing you all a restfull night and a sunny tomorrow. God bless. :smile:
On to my visit. She wasn't ready to talk about it. I didn't mention it at all and neither did she. Her therapist made a special trip to the school today to support both of us. She is absolutely amazing. She should be the example to all therapists!!! Anyway, as we were pulling up to the school my sister had to pull the car over because as soon as I saw the driveway I lost it!! I had a panic attack, couldn't catch my breath, my entire body shook and I thought I was gonna be sick. My sister, my hero, calmed me down and told me to pull it together, my daughter needed me. I was able to get back into control after just a few minutes. When we got there my daughter was very angry. Clearly manic. For the first half hour or so, she was ranting and raving and cursing up a storm. She calmed down after her therapist arrived, then we went on to have a pretty good visit. We had lunch, well they had lunch. I was too nervous to eat. I was just waiting for her to drop the bomb. She never did. I know that she needs to talk to me about it, but listening to you all, I knew not to push the issue. I will be ready for her when she is ready. I did have many concerns regarding her medications. She is only on concerta, lexapro and geodon. Nothing as far as a mood stabilizer. She has been on almost all of them in the past. We haven't mastered that piece of the puzzle yet. The dr. seems to think she is not bipolar just conduct disorder. No way!!! She went from raging to smiles in a split second. It was so evident. I told her therapist I want her on new medications immediately. It is not fair to her to leave in her in this state. How can they expect her to function. She wants to come home on a weekend vist, but they wont let her because she is not stable. DUH!!! Not without her medications she's not. So she will be seeing the dr. on Tuesday. I think she needs to get off the concerta as it only aggitates her. She likes the concerta because it keeps the weight off and helps her to stay focused, but it makes her miserable. I have seen alot of you say the same thing about concerta. Forget the ADHD, I think stabilizing the bipolar is more important. We left the visit on a good note. I'm so glad for that, I hate leaving her when she is sad and crying. She gave me a flower that she planted for me in a beautiful flower pot that she painted sunflowers on. She knows that's my favorite flower. We brought her new clothes and sneakers and of course that perked her mood right up!!! So all's well that ends well. (for now)
The whole time I was thinking of all of you. Thinking about all of the advice and support you have given me. I couldn't wait to get home and tell all of you how the visit was. This site has really made a difference in my life.
So when she is ready I will be a mess, but I will be strong for her. Like you said, this has happened to her not me and she needs me. Hearing from those of you that share in this horror, I now know better what to say and what not to say. Thank you for that. I will keep you posted.
Wishing you all a restfull night and a sunny tomorrow. God bless. :smile: