I posted a thread the other day, then deleted it because I felt too vulnerable. Monday night, black depression hit me like a truck and I wanted to die. Seriously. It was all I could think about. I was even trying to research the best way to do it because I figured if I took all my medications, I would just end up in a vegetative state and that would just svck. It was worse than any other major depressive episode I've ever had. Normally, for me, depression is a slide. This was just BAM. Well, I stopped the neurontin that had been prescribed for fibromyalgia and after three days off it, I feel normal again. One of the "unlikely, but serious side effects" of neurontin is mental/mood change. I always did like to get the "unlikely" side effects of medications. What's scary is I had only been on it for 5 days at the low dose for this to hit like that. I did some writing during that time and my thinking was really....twisted. I called my doctor's office today and they told me not to take it anymore. Told them I wasn't planning on it. I didn't call them before because, well, I wasn't sure I wanted help. I wasn't sure I wanted to live. See? Twisted. I'm just glad I was still with it enough to realize it might be the medication and stopped taking it. So, I'm back and it's all good. However, this isn't the first medication I've taken that has effected my mind/mood so strongly. I think that since my depression is clinical rather than situational, it might be a good idea to stay away from those medications with those possible side effects.