Staffing today - interesting take

timer lady

Queen of Hearts
You can all be reassured that I was on my best behaviors at the staffing this morning. Both psychiatrist & therapist had a copy of my email in front of them at the meeting.

Having said that, kt will be discharged as soon as all the services are in place & not before.

psychiatrist did indeed spend time pontificating ... but on another subject all together. This time it was a genuine discharge plan we discussed.

kt isn't significantly more functional than when she entered Residential Treatment Center (RTC). While she has matured she still needs 24/7 supervision &/or care. She is "5 star Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)" - I knew that. However, psychiatrist reiterated that both she & wm would be a lot worse off if husband & I hadn't stuck it out with them. Their sense of abandonment has lessened to a great degree. kt's level of trust, while not significant as a whole, has greatly improved.

Her needs are still extreme & will be so for a while.

Having said that, psychiatrist worked on a crisis plan with us. Mental health case manager, attachment therapist, SW were all in attendance.

Here it is...."can you manage this?" Yes or no. If there is a situation I feel that I cannot handle I'm to call whichever person is appropriate. First line of defense would be CM & therapist, then crisis team. Then up the line to psychiatrist, 911 or ER.

psychiatrist stated that he really didn't care what kt was presenting...what matters is if kt is manageable in a home setting.

I'm not to wait an hour to call crisis team. I'm not to look into my crystal ball to decide when kt will come out of her meltdown or dissociative state. If it is present it is an emergency & the troops are to be called in.

Reassure kt that we'll bake the cookies when she returns from the hospital (or whatever); that we will be here for her. I need to relax & parent (as best I can with an attachment disordered, severely traumatized child) & let the pros do their job.

Easier said than done. Another meeting ensued when Residential Treatment Center (RTC) staff & psychiatrist left the room. Those remaining in the room started working out strategies, numbers, resources & such to make this plan work. All were in agreement that for the most part I should do my best to parent, while the others would step in when necessary.

Document any & all incidents. Take all breaks offered; don't neglect my health or my marriage. Make sure that I don't miss out on piano or golf (wish insurance paid for these).

It will take practice on my part; responsiveness on the team's part. We're all invested in kt's success & highest level of functionality & have agreed to be "on call" when necessary.

The best laid plans.... :warrior:


Active Member

It sounds like a wonderful, workable plan and I know you can do it. You will have to retrain your responses with kt but I have all the confidence in the world that you will. :grin:

It sounds like the best meeting you have had in a long time and I saw a lot of teamwork from everyone in your words. :grin:

Made me feel good. :grin:


Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
It does sound like a good plan for kt. I'm glad they are going to be there for you to call when needed and that they don't want you to decide how long you should wait to call. I like the take all breaks available.

You are an incredible warrior mom :warrior:Many hugs.
FINALLY - a very productive meeting :smile:!!! It's so nice to see everyone working together for kt. Way To Go :warrior:!!! WFEN

P.S. When you figure out a way insurance will cover piano and golf, please fill us in!!! I don't know how to play golf or the piano, but have always wanted to take photography...


New Member
I'm glad you have plans in place KT and they sound like those plans give you time for you and your marriage.
Hugs for sticking up for those you love including you!


Active Member
Productive meetings are like a breath of fresh air - rare sometimes when we're overcrowded and polluted, with everybody using up all the oxygen, they're all talking at once - but when we get it it's memorable, enjoyable and clears the head.


timer lady

Queen of Hearts
Marg, you're right. Today's meeting was a breath of fresh air. There was an open & honest discussion of what needs to happen & when.

A comment was made today, that now is the best chance for kt to come home - while she is motivated. And our chances of success are higher than they were a year ago. :bravo:

Thanks ladies! :smile:

timer lady

Queen of Hearts

That's the impression I got. I've been on my own soapbox repeating again & again "this is a family disorder".

Maybe it's beginning to sink in. Even though this was a staffing for kt, wm was a big part of the meeting. They are twins & that must be taken into account in the treatment plan.

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful

Sounds like a very productive meeting. Looks like your email did the trick to keep them on track. :bravo:


So happy for you. Funny when I woke up the first thing I thought of was how your meeting went..(meant I wasn't dwelling on one of my own) Hope they are able to keep up all that they promised for you.


timer lady

Queen of Hearts
Beth, I also hope that the plan will be followed as promised.

I've been in "the system" long enough to know that the parent has to train the professional on the needs of their family. Of what works & what doesn't.

Advocating to this level is a full time job. Exhausting. I'm hoping to hand this job over to CM for a bit (while closely watching the results).

I'm excited to have kt transitioning back home. At the same time, I'm nervous beyond words that all hell will break lose.

I'm foolishly optimistic - have to be. The negatives would kill me. :rofl: