Hi I am new to this site and am hoping to find some help with my 12 yo son. A little background: My son has ADHD. He has been increasingly defiant in his behavior since puberty kicked in BIG TIME about 6-months ago. His father and I are divorced (my son was a baby when we divorced). He has always adored his dad and they have a good relationship, talk a few times a week via phone...yes, I get to be the BAD "every day" parent : )...someone has to be! I have tried to keep his Dad out of the day-to-day struggles...trying to keep things less stressful. BUT a few weeks back, my sons defiance was just overwhelming me...he wouldnt do ANYTHING..refusal to go to swim lesson, drum lesson....I called his dad, and he layed into him and was apparently very cruel with his words...it devastated my son. He pretty much stopped going to school. He also was lying to me about doing his homework - some long term projects, never got done. I met with his teachers and they were very understanding and gave him a lot of accomomodations to get his work done...none of which he has done. He lays in bed not wanting to do ANYTHING! I have called in all my resources, child pysch, therapists, pediatricians, school psychologist, teachers...but, still there he lies...I told him I loved him, but this may be a lesson only he can learn for himself. I am totally heartbroken over this. My long-time boyfriend (10yrs) can't deal with the stress in the house, so he and I aren't talking. I was really hopeful for a better 2011... its been a rough start.