J3,
You know, I've often thought about this scenario in my head as I am adopted. I'm sure that everyone who is adopted has different thoughts in their head for different reasons as to why they would or wouldn't want to meet siblings, 1/2 siblings or step-siblings. As I got older my mood about it all and my opinons changed so much from when I was young.
When I was younger I looked at EVERY person, girl, woman, man, boy and wondered often - could it be them? One afternoon when I was 18 or so a young man came into the jewelery shop where I worked and wanted something engraved. He just stood there staring at me. It was weird, but not weird at the same time. As I engraved the item he picked out rather quickly - he said "I bet I can guess your birthday" and did. Then he said I bet you were born in Cleveland, and I was. I was 18, and stunned. I finished his item - got him to pay for it, and he said "Thanks." and as I asked him how he knew these things he just smiled and said something to the effect of "Becase I was too." and left. I never saw him again.
I don't know if it was a brother, a twin or what and I'll never know because as I said, the older I get - the less curious I am. I figure it's like my best friend my senior year in HS. I couldn't WAIT after 20 plus years to reunite with her. I was so excited just to get a call. We were like twins, thought the same, behaved the same, had the same values - going to change the world and all that. Then she called - we spent 1 hr. on the phone, planned to keep in touch and then I got the Christmas card. It wasn't really a Christmas card...it was like a religious advertisement, basically saying if I didn't do THIS...X would surely happen. After that? Anytime she sent a letter or card it was about zealous religion, do this, or this will happen and it just isn't my cup of tea. I wrote and told her this, but any card she sent in her mind was a way to convert me. I'm already sound in my faith so this was unnecessary. I've since lost touch. On purpose.
My point is...sometimes it takes MORE than one common thing albeit genes or whatever to link you to someone else. AND without a doubt there are others who would literally jump at the chance to reunite and that's okay too. I am more pessimistic by nature and I think - OMG what if a person knocks on my door and says "I've been looking for you I'm your brother, sister, cousin, birth Mom's friend." I would be polite but would decline to hook up and reminisce. I have a life - I like it without complications...I don't think it's something that I pine for - and even if I did meet them- would we have anything in common and would I want to know the history of my "Why was I put up for adoption?" Nah - too much baggage I've dealt with in therapy.
You on the other hand don't have that to deal with - but I guess the biggest question would be - "What could you possibly have in common, is this reunion going to be lasting or is it a Q.&A. session for someone's curiousities, how much of the past IS going to be dredged up - are you going to dredge it up out of guilt for a "lost soul" looking for answers?" I think you have a very tough decision on your hands and I would weigh your options carefully. Once you meet you can't un-meet. Then again, it could be a wonderful addition to your family having a couple of 1/2 sisters.
I feel for you. I'm envious of Becky who would jump at the chance to meet siblings and has that entire good heart of love for those she hasn't met. I think that is a beautiful part of her. Just think this through - I'm sure you will.
Hugs
Star