Anyone who does not want to listen to me moan and whine, you might want to quit reading. I am so tired of husband and his never ending drama. Once again he is saving his friends. So and so is being bullied by his drug dealers, he wants to quit doing meth but is too scared of the dealers to quit. They come take his truck, beat him up, steal his things and he will not file charges. husband goes over there and scares them away. Another one lost his wife last year, and is not doing well. He spends all hours talking to him. This I really do not have much of a problem with, but it is more drama. Oh and there is another one. This one's wife left him. We will call the friend L, as this gets really confusing. L's wife cheated on him with his cousin, E. L and husband were snorting oxycontins for awhile. husband could not deal with the fact he knew that T (L's wife) was cheating on L with his cousin, E so he (husband) broke the news to L. That started a huge mess. E ended up abusive, so husband had to try to save her too. She moved a few hundred miles away to live with E and his mom. E conintues to be abusive, and T will not leave. L was dating a woman, and apparently her ex was in prison and has just gotten out. Apparently this guy is a little nutso, has been threatening L and and all his friends including husband. Death threats via txt messages. Apparently the police are involved and now have arrested the guy. After all this, the lies about the pill snorting, I just do not know when I can believe husband and when I can't. The one person I should be closest to? Is the one who I can barely stand. He will do anything he can to help his friends, but at the cost of his family. I wish I could trust him, but I can't. At this point I don't know if I can ever trust him again, ever believe him. We have nothing in common. He compared him helping his friends to my caring for my Grandfather, who is more like my father, who was DYING! To me, there is no comparison. It was not ongoing, there was going to be an endpoint, and it was for FAMILY. Anytime I needed anything, my grandfather was there. He has given me more money, paid for my college tuition, and even let me borrow money to get a car when I was in my accident. Which, by the way I will pay back to the estate. I really think my marriage is over. I just cannot do this. I go to work, cook, clean, take kids to appts and make their appts, make his appts and make sure that one doctor does not give him medications that will cause him to go manic, and he does nothing. Not a load of laundry or dishes. Right now? If I come home and he is home I am angry. Usually he is over in the garage, I think he lives there. He counts that as being home, but when you lock yourself in the garage and you are secluded from your family, that is not home. He says he goes over there and just cries, as he gets so depressed and has so much pain. I feel kinda bad and very cold, but I can't help but wonder if he is just saying that. I hate that I think that. I wish I could believe him, but it just seems like it is an excuse to get out of work. If I have to do everything and make all the decisions, then I might as well not have to deal with him and his koi. It makes me sad that it has come to this, that he is chosing his friends over his family and marriage. He says all I do is criticize him, that he cannot do anything right. You know what? He is probably right. I wish that myself and the kids were as important as his friends, that he acted like we are as important as he says we are. He says he has stopped all his medications and is only taking an AD. I don't know if I can believe him, and if he is taking an AD I do not know if it was prescribed to him or given to him by one of his wonderful friends. I don't know who would prescribe them for him, or if he is lying to me. He would not tell me what AD it was, so he may just be trying to "rile" me up. He likes to do that, seems to think that is fun. If you made it through this, you are an angel. I rambled a lot, but needed to just get this out.