difficult child is incarcerated due to being on a suspended sentence then pulling a knife on me. About the only "friend" he has in there is an 18yo who is in there for stabbing his grandmother to death. The other boy had no decent parents but his grandparents were great- by all accounts. He was in counseling and ALL had been warned that he was explosive. Of course the cops and courts don't do anything until after it has happened. He lost it one night when he was 14yo and stabbed his grandmother because she thought he was too young to get serious with a girl, then the girl broke up with him, He apparently blamed the grandmother. She was his biggest advocate and I have no doubt that he regrets his actions. He has done extremely well in Department of Juvenile Justice and their required JROTC. However, based on what difficult child says, it appears a little to me that the boy has suffered so much trauma- albeit much of it due to his own actions- that he doesn't express emotion or remorse in the way most people would. The boy has been incarcerated for 4 years so far. In that time he has graduated high school and gone as far as he can in JROTC. He is currently taking college classes. He never gets written up, according to difficult child. He never has a visitor but will be allowed contact with his father (who's a dead beat) when his father gets released from prison. (Juveniles here are not allowed contact with anyone, even a parent, if both are incarcerated). difficult child says he thinks the father only wants contact with this boy because the grandfather left some life insurance to him when he died. I think of this boy often. I wonder if he's helping my son or if his words/actions are doing my son more harm and leading him further astray. But I do really feel for him and can't imagine him doing so well when he's never had one single visitor or phone call and has no one left who really cares for him. He was originally sentenced to something like 50 years (I verified this by online newpaper articles) but has gotten it reduced to 25 years so far. I think somtimes that when difficult child is released, maybe he could write to him. Only parents and grandparents are allowed to visit, so I can't visit or anything- and no packages are allowed. But for some reason, my heart goes out to this kid. Would you try to do anything and get involved? Do you think it would help my son or only contribute to my son's tendency to domestic violence to try to help this other boy? by the way- his mother left him as a very young baby and his father has been in and out of prison all his life. His grandparents did love him, were involved in his school, had him in therapy, and were knowledgable, caring, reasonable guardians. Am I being too saympathetic? Juveniles are not allowed contact with others the way adult prisoners are so I'm not even sure if I'd have any opportunity to do anything other than write him and I have no clue what I'd write him about. ETA: I'm sure that most, if not all, of my attration to this boy's case is due to me thinking about the situation my son would be in if he had killed me when he pulled the knife on me. So while I do feel for this other boy and sympathize for him immaturely losing it and doing something that has life-long effects, I think more than anything I wish my son could/would look at him and think "but for the Grace of God, there go I".