Wow! Made my day

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by tired Cheryl, Sep 27, 2007.

  1. tired Cheryl

    tired Cheryl New Member

    Just wanted to share a small but very mighty bit of good news:
    this evening out of the blue, difficult child comes up to me gives me a hug and says, "I am so glad that you are my Mommy"

    I am still blown away by that! and will keep it in my treasure box along with the time 9 months ago (he was barely three years old at the time) when I noticed that he had a fever right after we sat down to dinner with family at a restaurant. I left with him right away and driving home I hear this small voice say, "That was so sweet of you mommy to drive me home because I am sick." My heart just melted! He was not only articulate but empathetic to the fact that I was taking him home due to his illness.

    I really needed that gem today because I spent many hours on the phone with the doctors, advocates, other parents, and the SD trying to figure out what will become of my son school-wise. The SD is saying that they need to see the Children's hospital neuropsychologist evaluation report before they decide if they will grant him and evaluation. They would not provide me with the form neurologist requested for OHI. The SD says that they decide if he is OHI after their evaluation. What he had previously was just a screening and they deemed him not in need of services due to him not lagging behind his peers academically. I feel like they are giving me the standard run-around only to deny us again.

    Advocates and the psychologists tell me that this particular SD Special Education is notorious for being very difficult and to expect and grueling fight with them.

    Other parents warn me to be careful what I am fighting for because many of the SD PPCD programs are not that great, do not have people that can help with his behavior issues, and my son may be in with other children that have very challenging physical needs.

    So, here I sit with my recently expelled preschooler. I work part-time at a "real" job while I am building a new facility and opening a new business next month! In addition, I am still going to an internist and hematologist for my own health problems. There were just not enough hours in the day and now I have this very pressing and time consuming problem with finding him a school.

    All of the decent preschools and most of the not so decent daycares are all full. Although, I know that these programs are not for my son and that he will most likely have problems and/or be expelled from them as well, I have placed our names on some waiting lists. We have been juggling schedules around the past week but cannot go on forever. Once my new business opens next month I can hire someone baby-sit him there (I think)but that will not be ideal and only a short-term solution. I can not leave him at home with someone. His behaviors and epilepsy will not allow it.

    Wish that I had a tape recorder going when he said his sweet words tonight-they are so few and far between. Very precious indeed.

  2. SnowAngel

    SnowAngel New Member

    Congrats!! Those are the moments that make it all worth the h*ll we go through daily. Keep being his advocate. He is worth ruffling a few feathers in the roost.
  3. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Those moments make up for so many others.
  4. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    Definitely a memory keeper!

    That is incorrect information. You do not have to release the report unless you want to.
    1) They are giving you the runaround
    2) I'd think the doctor would have a form. If not, a letter will do.
    3) Then they need to get on the evaluation, don't they? And it's not just the sd that "decides." The parent is a full member of the team and eligibility under OHI is a team decision.

    I cut my teeth on Special Education in Texas' school district from Hell. Since then I've done quite a bit of work in other districts with-parents. They can all be difficult -- some are just more difficult than others.

    I hope you have a good advocate.

    You may need to contact the Texas Education Agency's parent hotline. "Toll Free Parent Information Line: 1-800-252-9668
    This toll free message line is reserved for parents and other family members who have questions about student rights and regulatory requirements as they relate to special education complaint investigations, mediations, and due process hearings. Calls are returned by trained professionals during normal business hours."

    If you sent a letter via certified mail parent referring your child for evaluation under IDEA, they must either do the evaluation or give you written refusal outlining why they think the evaluation is unnecessary. "Because we said so" is not sufficient.

    From the US Department of Education:
    Section 300.301(b) provides
    that a parent may initiate a request for
    an initial evaluation to determine if the
    child is a child with a disability. If the
    public agency agrees to conduct the
    evaluation, § 300.304(a) requires the
    public agency to provide notice to the
    parents, in accordance with § 300.503,
    that describes any evaluation
    procedures that the agency proposes to
    conduct. The public agency must obtain
    informed consent for the evaluation,
    consistent with §§ 300.9 and 300.300,
    prior to conducting the evaluation. The
    60-day timeframe begins when the
    public agency receives the consent for
    If, however, the public agency does
    not suspect that the child has a
    disability and denies the request for an
    initial evaluation, the public agency
    must provide written notice to the
    parents, consistent with § 300.503(b)
    and section 615(c)(1) of the Act, which
    explains, among other things, why the
    public agency refuses to conduct an
    initial evaluation and the information
    that was used as the basis to make that
    decision. The parent may challenge
    such a refusal by requesting a due
    process hearing,

    You can look up all the citations at to get the specifics referenced.

    Buried in all those links on the sp ed page is a Guide to the ARD (no where but Texas is IEP evaluations and meetings referred to as "ARD" business. Guide_English_ 8_16_07.pdf

    The school district should have provided you with Procedural Safeguards upon receipt of a parent referral for evaluation. If they haven't, it's a non-compliance issue with federal and state law.

    FYI, we have a Special Education 101 forum on this site. If you need additional information pertinent to IEPs, evaluations, etc., visit us there.
  5. tired Cheryl

    tired Cheryl New Member

    Thanks for all of the info Sheila. I have looked on the Special Education forum but gosh it is just overwhelming to me! All of these new acronyms and such. I will soon post my questions there but do want to ask just one at this time:

    Is the PPCD in Texas SDs really worth the fight?? DOn't know what else we will do though. WE cannot afford the private options.

    My son's neuro is at the Children's hospital and they have a full-time Social WOrker who told me that the OHI form is provided by SD and then Dr. fills it out.

    The people at the SD have their answers all ready and really stick to the script. I must say that the advocates that I have spoken to have not really given me much hope. They say that I am in for a "bitter fight." Great! Just what I have with difficult child on a daily basis.

    Fighting, fighting and more fighting. All I want is peace and tranquility. difficult child's therapist says that I will not have that for a long time :frown: and that is why I need therapy myself. Who wouldn't be depressed with that news?

    I would like to PM you if that is ok. I am in the Houston suburbs.

  6. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    PM away.
  7. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat


    Record what happened yesterday. In a journal or something.

    One day, when things look bleak, you will have that to look back on, and it will make you smile.

    How absolutely precious that he said that!
  8. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    Precious words that speak volumes about you!
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    hugs,honey. I understand your concerns. The options when we lived in OH were so bad and the fight so horrible (esp since anything the school didn'tlike was taken out on my son!) that I quit my job and homeschooled him for 2 years. He would have killed himself in 3rdor 4th grade if we hadn't made this radical change.

    NOT saying you should make this change, but you have to work to figure out what is right for your family and child. difficult child is in public school now, in high school!!

  10. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

  11. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Very sweet-those comments really do make ones day!