A very Kanga Christmas

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by JJJ, Dec 17, 2008.

  1. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    husband and I went up to Kanga's Residential Treatment Center (RTC) yesterday to celebrate Christmas with her. It started out well with a successful IEP meeting. We were very pleased with the Special Education Coop staff (the school staff seems confused by IEPs despite it being a Special Education school) but the Coop staff ran the meeting and it went very well.

    Then we drove 30 minutes to a nursing home to hear the school choir sing. Kanga knew most of the words to the songs and sang and danced with the other kids. She completely avoided eye contact with the audience (sign that she's not real stable).

    As soon as Kanga got back to school we took her to celebrate Christmas in one of the family homes at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC). She was very happy to give us the presents she had made. Then she opened all of hers, showing appropriate excitement and saying thank you when prompted.

    After that it started to go downhill, she became sullen and quit talking. She picked at her food (we brought a full turkey dinner). She asked us to leave. At that point we'd been with her just under an hour. We were able to have family therapy start early.

    I think family therapy went very well. Kanga was disrespectful, contradicted herself, confirmed that the voices are actively speaking against us, threatened to shoot her brother with a gun, etc. etc. While I disliked being called a b**** and hearing how horribly angry she still is and that she still wants to be violent, I was glad that the therapist was able to witness it all. The therapist even commented that husband and I were remaining totally calm and respectful of Kanga even as she became more obnoxious. She told Kanga that she needs to own her problems and her anger.

    I'm really liking this therapist. I think she has a chance of reaching Kanga. Of course, Kanga has to want peace rather than chaos.

    The other 3 were with my mom all day. She reported A+ behavior and has volunteered to babysit again on Friday night because she had such a great time!!!
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Sounds like a great day overall, despite Kanga's continued instability. Like you said, at least this therapist witnessed Kanga's reality. It helps no one if she put on a "show" that fools people into thinking everything's rosey.

    You should jump on that babysitting offer and go enjoy an evening out! :D
  3. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    I am glad the other 3 did well, you and husband should go out sometime and enjoy yourselves.

    As for Kanga, I am sorry but at least she showed her true colors for the professionals and that you and husband kept your cool.
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Glad the younger three had a good time with your mom. I'd grab that offer for a night out!

    Sorry your visit with Kanga went downhill, but glad the therapist got to see it. Also glad you and husband kept calm.
  5. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    So glad the coop finally pulled through for you guys!!!

    I've been wondering how old Kanga's been doing. I'm sorry she wasn't able to tolerate more of a visit. It does sound like the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is doing a really nice job of keeping her engaged outside the program!! School choir??? How cool!

    Glad you got glowing reports on the rest of your crew! Hope you and husband were able to enjoy the drive... oh my gosh, wait a minute - you probably were heading home in the storm!!! Uhhh, never mind. ;)
  6. JLady

    JLady A ship lost in the night

    I'm new here and I can't even begin to imagine what you go through. Prayers for you and yours. God bless you all.
  7. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Thanks all!

    Sue - The normal 2 hour drive took 4.5 hours last night for a total of 8 hours in the car (2.5 hours there, 1 hour to/from choir show, 4.5 home)!!!!! husband was totally wiped today.