trinityroyal
Well-Known Member
I've just about hit the breaking point, and I need to vent!
Ever since difficult child came home from the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) in August he's been an absolute NIGHTMARE to be around. He's miserable and defiant and mouthy and pushy, and having some very ugly moods and destrictuve behaviour. :grrr:
Earlier in the summer he ran into some trouble with the police, and he now has to be either under SO's or my direct supervision, or in lockdown in the house.
I had him at the office with me for a couple of weeks when he first came home (and was terrified daily that I would lose my job over it). Step-d has been coming over every day to stay with him while SO and I are at work. We are desperately trying to find a new Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement for him, and possibly have something lined up for lat October, but I'm wondering how we'll all survive the next few weeks until then.
Much as I'm grateful for Step-d's help...we could not do this if not for her...she just can't handle difficult child's defiance or rages, and things are getting out of hand. Whenever SO or I get home from work there's chaos. The house is a pigsty, difficult child is usually locked in his room, Step-d has bruises and scratches all up her arms where difficult child has been going after her...and it just goes on.
In the last 2 days alone, difficult child has stolen things from our (locked) home office and his little brother's (locked) room, punched Step-d and grabbed her hard enough to leave finger marks on her arms, and when she found him looking at...umm...highly inappropriate content on the internet and told him to get off the computer, he threatened her with a kitchen knife.
SO works full time and I work 2 jobs to pay for all the treatment, therapy and medications for difficult child (if you think Canada has free health care, you're mistaken, but that's another rant...)
Little easy child is staying with relatives right now so that he doesn't have to be in the middle of all this mess. Step-d is suffering at the hands of difficult child. And SO has a heart condition, and this is taking a huge toll on him. His health had already deteriorated terribly since difficult child's been home, and then he was in a car accident a few weeks ago that has made things so much worse. And I'm just trying to hold it together myself because someone has to...But I'm about ready to snap. I love difficult child but right now I just want him gone. I want him out of my house so that I can take care of my other kids and my SO. If anything happens to my SO because of this...I will blame difficult child, and I don't know if I'll be able to forgive him.
I feel like a terrible mom for having such thoughts, but I just want him to go away. :tissue:
Thanks for listening.
Trinity
Ever since difficult child came home from the Residential Treatment Center (RTC) in August he's been an absolute NIGHTMARE to be around. He's miserable and defiant and mouthy and pushy, and having some very ugly moods and destrictuve behaviour. :grrr:
Earlier in the summer he ran into some trouble with the police, and he now has to be either under SO's or my direct supervision, or in lockdown in the house.
I had him at the office with me for a couple of weeks when he first came home (and was terrified daily that I would lose my job over it). Step-d has been coming over every day to stay with him while SO and I are at work. We are desperately trying to find a new Residential Treatment Center (RTC) placement for him, and possibly have something lined up for lat October, but I'm wondering how we'll all survive the next few weeks until then.
Much as I'm grateful for Step-d's help...we could not do this if not for her...she just can't handle difficult child's defiance or rages, and things are getting out of hand. Whenever SO or I get home from work there's chaos. The house is a pigsty, difficult child is usually locked in his room, Step-d has bruises and scratches all up her arms where difficult child has been going after her...and it just goes on.
In the last 2 days alone, difficult child has stolen things from our (locked) home office and his little brother's (locked) room, punched Step-d and grabbed her hard enough to leave finger marks on her arms, and when she found him looking at...umm...highly inappropriate content on the internet and told him to get off the computer, he threatened her with a kitchen knife.
SO works full time and I work 2 jobs to pay for all the treatment, therapy and medications for difficult child (if you think Canada has free health care, you're mistaken, but that's another rant...)
Little easy child is staying with relatives right now so that he doesn't have to be in the middle of all this mess. Step-d is suffering at the hands of difficult child. And SO has a heart condition, and this is taking a huge toll on him. His health had already deteriorated terribly since difficult child's been home, and then he was in a car accident a few weeks ago that has made things so much worse. And I'm just trying to hold it together myself because someone has to...But I'm about ready to snap. I love difficult child but right now I just want him gone. I want him out of my house so that I can take care of my other kids and my SO. If anything happens to my SO because of this...I will blame difficult child, and I don't know if I'll be able to forgive him.
I feel like a terrible mom for having such thoughts, but I just want him to go away. :tissue:
Thanks for listening.
Trinity