DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
personally I dont think quitting smoking at the same time someone is attempting to quit anything else is setting them up to fail.
T
toughlovin
Guest
Janet, I think it probably depends on the person. At this point what I have totally realized is his quitting anything is up to him and I need to stay out of it. I don't want to micromanage his finances. I am willing to give him a certain amount for food a month... if he chooses to spend it on cigarettes then that is his business... However I don't want to give him $50 extra a month for his smoking habit because he chooses to smoke over eating.
I think the real issue is that he struggles on how to manage money... that is what he needs to learn. I want him to get that but I am not pushing it before Tuesday. LOL. We will talk to him about it after court on Tuesday.
TL
I think the real issue is that he struggles on how to manage money... that is what he needs to learn. I want him to get that but I am not pushing it before Tuesday. LOL. We will talk to him about it after court on Tuesday.
TL
TL just about everyone in the treatment center difficult child was in smoked. Cigarettes do not alter the mind. They may be addictive but so is sugar and lipgloss and any number of other things people use in excess. Cigarettes are harmful to our bodies but you are right, they don't cause the harm that mind altering drugs and substances do. I think if you took away the residents cigarettes in the treatment center the beds would be empty and they center would fold. I never heard of anyone suggesting they give up smoking while going through rehab. AA/NA meetings are filled with smokers. He would never survive. It's like putting an alcoholic in a bar.
I think you are doing the right thing, you are taking one step at a time and you are keeping his sobriety as the main focus. Whatever helps that should be paramount.
Nancy
I think you are doing the right thing, you are taking one step at a time and you are keeping his sobriety as the main focus. Whatever helps that should be paramount.
Nancy
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
I agree with you guys on the cigs. I think it is absolutely idiotic that they wont let psychiatric patients have cigs when they are on the psychiatric floors. Are the staff nuts? Its bad enough that a patient is crazy enough that they need to be inpatient but to also force them into withdrawal from cigarettes at the same time is just cruel and unusual punishment. Same thing with jail. I actually think that in prison they can buy cigarettes. At least I see some of them smoking in the cells on true prison shows.
T
toughlovin
Guest
When my son was on the psychiatric ward they gave him the patch and nicotine gum... he was surprised actually at how much it helped and I actually made him think about the possibility of quitting smoking. I do think though that in the sober living environments almost everyone smokes and so it might not be the easies time or place to quit.
He is actually thinking of changing sober living places. That worried me because I assumed he would be looking at a less restrictive one. I looked at the new possibility on line and it actually looks really good and may be better than the one he is at. I think a number of people he met in residential went there. Anyway that is something we are going to talk about when he is here tomorrow and Tuesday.
TL
He is actually thinking of changing sober living places. That worried me because I assumed he would be looking at a less restrictive one. I looked at the new possibility on line and it actually looks really good and may be better than the one he is at. I think a number of people he met in residential went there. Anyway that is something we are going to talk about when he is here tomorrow and Tuesday.
TL
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
You may find this somewhat amusing...or not...or even somewhat pathetic...lol. Back in August of 05 I had what I thought were chest pains so I hightailed it to the ER. I ended up being admitted for 5 days. They hooked me up to heart leads and so forth. Evidently the EKG must have been good because they didnt keep me on it for long. I did have an IV though. I ended up dragging that drip outside to the smoking area in the parking deck at least once an hour all day long. I even had to do one of those nuclear stress tests one morning and I couldnt eat or drink anything before which meant I couldnt have my morning diet coke. I find I really cant smoke well without something to drink with them. At least water but I really like carbonated drinks. So I didnt smoke that morning at all...by the time that test was over I didnt even go to my room. I had money in my pocket along with my smokes and I hit the parking lot...lol. I think I sat out there for at least an hour just smoking and drinking. The nurses said they thought they lost me!
Now they wont let you do that anymore which is one of the reasons I dont want to go have any surgery done. My therapist said everyone can just be so glad that I was in a coma when I had meningitis because I would have never been a good patient.
Now they wont let you do that anymore which is one of the reasons I dont want to go have any surgery done. My therapist said everyone can just be so glad that I was in a coma when I had meningitis because I would have never been a good patient.
My difficult child smokes and I used to swear that I would never buy her cigarettes. Well, that was just another one that bit the dust. We are buying her cigarettes while she is in the halfway house and we also bought them for her while she was in the rehab center.
Like the others said, smoking cigarettes is the least of difficult child's problems and I don't think she could handle sobriety and giving up cigarettes at the same time.
We have put a limit on what we will spend on cigarettes, though. We bought her three packs today and told her it had to last a week.
~Kathy
Like the others said, smoking cigarettes is the least of difficult child's problems and I don't think she could handle sobriety and giving up cigarettes at the same time.
We have put a limit on what we will spend on cigarettes, though. We bought her three packs today and told her it had to last a week.
~Kathy
Bean
Member
A lot of is it person-to-person, but for us? We don't give our daughter cash. She has not been shown to be responsible with it. I don't want to buy her booze or drugs or any of that. We do give her toothpaste, conditioner, etc. I keep a good stock of it and will hand it out to her if she needs. I'll also give her groceries that we have from time to time, mostly one-bowl stuff, or mac and cheese - easy stuff. I want her to do as much as she can herself.
