Adult child troubles

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Livinblonde, Jul 21, 2017.

  1. Livinblonde

    Livinblonde New Member

    Hi all, I'm new to this site. I found it online today and I believe it was a godsend.

    My son is 23 and has been diagnosed with schizophrenia forem a few months back. We began a treatment program but he hasn't stuck to it because he feels there's no problem. He was kicked out of his girlfriends today, and I don't blame her. He refuses to get help, work or even be help in any way. He wants to come back home - but he was here for 4 months and that didn't help him in any way. I'm at a loss - am I a horrible mom not to want him here. I grew up with a drug addict and I know the enabling game and I don't want to play. I keep his insurance paid in hopes he will get treatment and I will go to him when he needs me, I just don't/ can't have him here with my other kids.

    Anyone here on a ride like this?
  2. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet


    I do not but others do. It's sometimes slow here this time of day on a Friday.

    I just wanted you to know that we're here and someone will respond to you shortly!

  3. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    I have a 20 year old with-mental illness. He is a drug user/dealer. He refuses to get help. He is very unpleasant to be around unless he wants something. He is not welcome in my home until I see evidence that he is through with that life.
  4. ForeverSpring

    ForeverSpring Well-Known Member

    Is your don sble to tell real grom fantasy? Is he paranoid? Does he also use drugs?
  5. Livinblonde

    Livinblonde New Member

    He is very smart in that he can tell what is fantasy and can pull himself out of it. He's smoked some weed - but has had no access to drugs. No money. He's more anxious than paranoid. Really hateful and withdrawn.
  6. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    Welcome, Livinblonde. Did your son's mental illness coincide with his marijuana use? My late husband was depressed but became psychotic after he began smoking marijuana. (He wanted to use it as a form of pain management. ) I had seen people use pot before, and they all became mellow and chill. Not so with my husband. He went bat poop crazy: paranoia, irrational, totally and completely unreasonable.
  7. Livinblonde

    Livinblonde New Member

    No - this set in about 8 months ago. I noticed it and everyone wrote me off. He is currently in a hospital with an IVC. He will be transferred to treatment Monday. Hopefully we caught a break. He's mad st me - but he is alive.

    I have no idea what set this off.
  8. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    I highly recommend the book Ben Behind His Voices by Randye Kaye. Her son was diagnosed with schizophrenia and she discusses her journey in depth. She was able to get him the help he needed. No one really knows what causes schizophrenia. I think you did an amazing job getting him to the hospital and keeping him alive - mad or not.

    Also, I completely support your decision to not have him at home with the other children. My kids witnessed their father at his worst. It is a horror that they will carry with them forever. I think it undermines your feeling of safety in the world which I think is important for a child.