After School Care

unc tarheel

New Member
I was wondering how those with young school age children (6-8 yrs) deal with after school care. My husband and I had considered having our 7yr difficult child go to after school care where he is going to sunmer camp now. Unfortunately, that will be a " no go"- Even with us talking with the director of the school and giving her info/tips on how to deal. They are just not able to to handle difficult child being a difficult child. So, I will pick him up after school ( I work the night shift and have to at work at 7pm). I might get 45 min less sleep 2-3 days a week, but overall I believe less stress :)

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Staff member
My kid has grown up so I don't have any real advice to give you about after school care. I just wanted to let you know that I read your posts and sympathize with your situation. You must be really frustrated that the school director won't see if they can make it work. Seems like it would be reasonable of the school to at least give it a try.

You're lucky that your work schedule allows you to pick him up after school. Hopefully you can catch up on your sleep on your days off.

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I know how hard this is. We were lucky in that the after school program took our difficult child. I remember one time when another parent tried to get him kicked out and the director said his child was as guilty as our difficult child in whatever incident it was. I felt so relieved.

I hope that things work out. Sending hugs your way.


Well-Known Member
Hey unc,

I tell you, when my difficult child was young and in school, I would gladly have traded 45 minutes of sleep for less stress! I think you are making a very wise choice.



My son (autism. adhd & anxiety disorder) was in after school care for 3 years. It was not great but I needed to work and had no choice. Since it was run by public schools they had to accommodate his disability and I had it put in his IEP that his school provide info/strategies to after school care. After school care only went through 6th grade and now he is home alone for a few hours. Nerve-wrecking at first but a good learning experience.


Roll With It
After-school care was always soo hard for us. By that time my kids were usually on overload and that is tough to handle, esp for difficult child and for thank you (his sensory issues made it really hard).

We never really found a solution other than having a parent (me) handle things rather than sending the kids to a program.

One thing I know some parents here do is to contact the local university dept of education or of child development and ask for recommendations of students who would be willing to handle the after-school care. If they have classes about Special Education, esp if some of the classes address the specific issues/diagnosis's that your kids have, this can be a win for the family and the student because the student gets real experience that is invaluable. There are almost always more students in the univ than openings for teachers in the daycare/after-school programs, so this is a great way to get hands-on experience. You can either ask the dept secretary or the professors for recommendations. You can even put up flyers on bulletin boards in some schools. We have a 4 yr univ here with excellent dept of education, but even the 2 yr colleges usually have some sort of child development classes.

I would insist on references and a background check though. At the very least google them, check their facebook/twitter/vine/whatever and pay the $5 or so for a public records check. You can check for sex offenders online for free, but for a fairly low sum, many online search services will check all sorts of other databases too. Be aware that you can be on the sex offender database for many things, some awful and some relatively minor. A kid I went to high school with ended up on the list for skinny dipping in his backyard in the middle of the night.

If you cannot find a college kid, you might then look at the high school kids for a day or three a week to give you a break.