Angry, sick, frustrated, horrified, worried, scared...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Shari, Oct 22, 2009.

  1. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    difficult child 1's wife calls DEX's girlfriend "scarecrow".

    To make a long story short, DEX called me tonight.

    First time since 2003. He wants wee difficult child Sunday. Scarecrow (not DEX) wants a family picture.

    What will it do to wee difficult child's new found of stability to throw this into the mix? Man, I'm angry at that woman.
    Last edited: Oct 22, 2009
  2. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    Just say no. He hasn't made any attempt to be a part of wee difficult child's life and this will probably cause more harm than good.

    If Scarecrow wants a family picture, than she should have one with the people that DEX has treated like family.
  3. ML

    ML Guest

    I hope you can get out of it but if you can't, try to keep that visit SHORT! I'm so sorry. Hugs, ML
  4. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Try to postpone if you don't feel you can say no. Maybe at Thanksgiving or Christmas. This way maybe scarecrow will forget about it.
    I wouldn't allow stability to be shaken for anything if I could.
  5. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I slept on it last night...I told my work last week that I will not attend 10 day training away from home because of wee difficult child's stability. Maybe next year...not now, its too new.

    The third day of school this year, I would not allow the school, who had "trained people", to take him until they gave me a satisfactory plan for dealing with him - I would not risk bringing that "metldown" into this year...not after the progress we'd made.

    I have to treat DEX like I do anyone else. Forget who he is and what he could do. I have to do what I would do for wee difficult child if it was anyone...I won't and don't keep wee difficult child from DEX...but DEX is not allowed to take him, and she is not allowed to play her fantasy family games with him. We've already had to shut that down twice, and difficult child 1 has had to do the same. We've seen the effect of that.

    I'll take him for the photo shoot if our other plans get cancelled. Beyond that, the answer is no, DEX doesn't take off with him for her benefit.

    I pray this doesn't get ugly.
    Last edited: Oct 23, 2009
  6. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Shari, remember that NO ONE has any control over us that we do not give them. Be strong and continue to advocate for wee difficult child the way you have always done. You are right to not want to risk his stability over trying to make a nut job like that happy. You owe them nothing. You lose nothing by standing firm.
  7. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    What a mess. I wouldn't let my kid go along, either.