Birthday Party Planning, difficult child Style


Active Member
difficult child has an upcoming birthday so we're in the early planning stages. We agreed upon his gift and wrote it down together so there will be no surprises in that department. The real issue at hand now is that difficult child wants an overnight and this is the age that we start those around our house. difficult child has two great buddies so it's a given that they would be the ones invited. The problem is that he can't handle more than about 3 hours of togetherness with them at his house. He goes into overload, gets testy and often blows.

I talked to difficult child about this and he did acknowledge it as a possible problem (that's progress!). Then I asked him for some possible solutions and he thought that he would just go ahead and sleep in his room, one should sleep in the living room, and one in the basement. Um... :hammer:

I think we still have a ways to go on this. :wink: If there was something good coming out in the theater I'd have them come late and take them to the movie .

Anyone else come up with ways to give the difficult child birthday kid a break at their own party?

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Are there some individual type games that they could each be playingin the same room-would a video help? I'll try to think more on this right now I'm somewhat braindead. I think it is good he recognizes a potential problem.


SRL, don't know if this will work, but can you have a "sleepover" without the boys sleeping over? In other words, the boys could come for dinner, bring their sleeping bags, watch a movie and eat popcorn, and then go home. That might give him the space he needs.

And then again, difficult child may be onto something about sleeping in different parts of the house. My difficult child 2 recently had a slumber party with 7 other girls (were we nuts?). Toward midnight, difficult child 2 was tired, but some of her friends wanted to keep talking. So she and one other friend went downstairs to our sunroom to sleep. The rest of the girls stayed in difficult child 2's room and eventually nodded off. It worked for difficult child 2.

Good luck with the birthday preparations.


Well-Known Member

I think it's great that difficult child realizes he may end up needing some space. I would however, urge him to allow the other boys to sleep together :grin:!

I think starting the party late is a good start. If you are doing like pizza and cake, have them come over between 6 and 7. Start the party later so there is more potential down time. Take difficult child to blockbuster and pick out a few movies or games for his game system that everyone would enjoy. Dump a huge bucket of lego on the floor and have a contest - challenge the boys to build something "futuristic" with 30 minutes for a prize.

Good luck.



We have had three over, but difficult child chooses one that will stay. We eat something special or go out, then they play video's, watch movies until late. Then two go home. Tried having more than one stay, ends up two against one by morning.