Christmas doesn't feel special here...bah humbug!!!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by MidwestMom, Dec 24, 2012.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Part of that is probably because we aren't really practicing Christians. I believe there is a higher power and reincarnation and there is no church. Hub is agnostic. Kids follow my beliefs. I would love to go to a Midnight Mass. I think all spirituality is positive and I love the feeling and energy at Midnight Mass. But nobody will go with me and I'm not going to show up alone on Christmas Eve.

    A good deal of it is that we just can't see family on the holidays. Until our three problem dogs are allowed in to the sanctuary, (there are five families ahead of us) my husband can not come with if we travel. He has to watch the dogs. This year, because of the blizzard, Jumper, Sonic and I did not go to Illinois to share an early Christmas with Julie, my pastry chef, and that hurts. It will just be the four of us, and no football game, which is the highlight of our small Thanksgiving Day (plus the food). I didn't even cook. I just got pre-ordered food. Sure, it will be good, and, of course, I could have cooked too,'s hard for me to feel like cooking a grand meal for three. Sonic does not eat or like normal food so he sits with us, but eats stuff he buys and cooks.

    There are no grandchildren. My grandson is in Missouri. We have a small tree, presents, and even got presents for the dogs. About it.

    Because we have such a small family, and we don't get to see Julie on the actual holiday, I feel kind of let down on the holidays. Then...I read about the problems people have with their big families, and I don't know if I'd like that any better, unless almost everyone got along...


  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Since it's (in previous years) been just me and Kiddo and I usually work Christmas, we usually do everything on Yule, so by Christmas day we're like ... isn't it over yet? and forget it's not for everyone else. Even though I leave the tree up until after New Years because I was raised that it's bad luck to take it down before that I'm already itching to take it down already this year. Doesn't help that the cat likes to eat the tree (fake tree, I have no clue why the cat likes to eat it).

    Happy Holiday whatever you're celebrating everyone!
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Merry Christmas MWM. This day is hard for many people and it was for me for several years but I kept telling myself it was just another day and I would survive it and the sky would not fall because I didn't have the Norman Rockwell family. I learned how to make this day special for those around me at the time. Do something nice for yourself and don't think about what was or what isn't.

  4. muttmeister

    muttmeister Well-Known Member

    Not having a good Christmas here either. Usually we go all out but this year, with the grandkids whereabouts unknown it is a downer. If it weren't for my mother we would probably just skip it. Older son will not be here so it will be just younger son, my mother, and me. Can't get out to go to church because of my mother. Weather is crappy. Son is crappy. I'm feeling mentally crappy. We'll go through the motions but this is probably the worst Christmas we've ever had.
  5. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Personally, though I usually love Christmas, I just want it over this year. on the other hand that puts me a couple days closer to back to work... Sigh. Maybe that's my problem... I've gotten lazy!

    But between having to work my way around mother in law and father in law (though father in law is not the issue here), and biogma being AWOL (starting to worry, there)... And Onyxx... Ugh.
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Thanks, all of you. Nancy, especially thanks for your words of wisdom. Can't change what isn't :/ And, Step, yep. I have to go back to work Jan. 3rd and not looking forward to that. The vacation is nice!
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Step I don't want to sound like I'm preaching so if I am just tell me and I'll shut up but years ago someone told me that we have two chances at this family thing. The first is when we were children but we had no control over it and so things may not have gone the way we wanted. But the second time was when we become a parent and we have the chance to do it all over again the way we want. From the looks of it you have a very supportive family so that part is taken care of. Now close your eyes to everything else and cherish this little bundle of joy that you have and make it a great Christams for her. She will remember what you teach her and she is such a joy and wonderful gift in your life that you have all the blessings you could possibly ask for in her. I know things around you aren't the best but your baby is waiting to learn all about this season and this world and you will be a wonderful teacher. I mean just look at her face and you can't help but block everything else out and enjoy the moment.

    This is when you practice the serenity to accept the things you cannot change part and just love that little baby.

  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    mwm, I have always had a pretty small family but that doesnt always mean things have to be horrible. I probably sound like the worst one to give advice about having a good Xmas but maybe not.

    I think I have gone to the midnight mass maybe 5 times in my whole life and that was when I was younger and went with friends who really wanted to go. Or maybe it was when I was up with my dad's family, I cant remember. It was nice though.

    With just a small family of me and my parents we often had dinner out after I opened my presents. We went to a really nice place just the three of us. Always on Xmas eve we went out to see the lights. When I was older, I did the lights with my friends but I was always home for dinner with my parents and then xmas morning and the dinner out with my parents. Then my friends and I hit the roads to go see what others

    When it was just me and Tony and the 3 boys, well we had to make our own traditions. We also did the lights on Xmas eve with Oyster stew. On Xmas day the kids opened their presents, Tony made them biscuits early and then got dinner going. They played all day long while we watched the rose bowl parade. Oddly we hardly ever had any difficult child behavior on that day. They would be really good. In the later years when we had stuff like VCR's or even DVR's we would get movies to watch that we had wanted to watch but had put off watching until that day.

    You dont have to have a large family. I get being upset you couldnt get to pastrychef's house. I would be upset too.

    I think if I were you I would grab jumper and get her to help you make some sort of yummy cookies or something and then watch a ball game on TV. I think there are basketball games on Xmas. She should like that.
  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Thanks, Janet. Wow, your post helped me and I appreciate it, especially since I know things are hard for you right now (I hope you do have a good Christmas). I think we will do exactly what you suggested today and watch basketball! We usually don't, but there's no football and Jumper does play so why not? That, or we'll get a movie. Thank you very much.
  10. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Also get in the car tonight and go out and see the lights and then come home and make big ole cups of hot cocoa with either whipped cream or as many marshmallows as you can pile in there! I find that helps too. I make my cocoa hot and then keep eating my marshmallows as they melt and replace!
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Love the idea and I will!!! I feel warm, toasty and family-like already!!!! You're great. thank you!!!!