Developmentally Delayed, ADD and Impulsive behavior-medicate?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by msmith, Apr 8, 2011.

  1. msmith

    msmith New Member


    Our son is almost 18 and developmentally delayed. He has been diagnosed with ADD. We have never medicated him because we didn't see the need. Now that he is almost 18 (and more like a 12 year old in many ways), I am concerned about his impulsive behavior. He has been called into the office for hugging girls when they don't want him to (he doesn't always read social ques well.) He is ALWAYS wrestling and poking at his friends. I'm concerned he is going to lose friends or be accused of doing something wrong when that was not his intent. Overall he is a good kid with good morals but he can be VERY annoying with his constant pushing and roughhousing. We are now considering medicating him to help with impulse control. I believe that he would make better choices if his brain was firing off a little slower (as good as any other 18 year old anyway :) Have you had this experience? What medications would you suggest we look into? Other suggestions?
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Sounds like autistic spectrum disorder. All those kids are developmentally delayed, especially in social skills. My son is also turning eighteen and is on the autistic spectrum. He would probably do well with social skills help.

    My son is unmedicated.
  3. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    My son is only 9 but he takes risperdal, and it did help with his agressiveness and somewhat with his impulsive behavior, but its not a medication to be taken lightly, nor am I a doctor, nor do I play one on tv. lol. I would suggest finding a doctor who's got experience dealing with adhd (and not just with medications) and work with them on a medication/therapy combination. Social skills training probably would be a really great thing for him.
  4. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    Wow, your son's physical behaviour (constantly wanting to interact with his environment, often "inappropriately", by poking, touching, wrestling, etc) sounds like mine (please don't be offended by that, I am just expressing my surprise). I was really hoping and thinking that with greater age and maturity, these behaviours would slip away but they obviously don't all by themselves... What does your son think about taking medication to help himself - is he in favour?
  5. karmadestiny

    karmadestiny New Member

    Medications can either help or hinder...everyone has a different view...some children respond well, while others it makes no difference and are constantley being prescribed one set of medications after the other...or a your son under a specialist? even if his not placed on medications he will be able to access help through the Autism communication team...they can help him to understand why it is not acceptable to behave in a way he feels is appropriate by not realising his actually causing distress to others...Autistic children are either overly sensitive or under sensitive in their sensory needs...they may also be both overly sensitive and under sensitive at the same time too...These children don't mean to be overly aggressive but just need more of stronger touch or feel to be stimulated...therefore their hug becomes a big bear hug for another or a noose if hugged from the back...these children need a one to one with specialists who can understand them and use different methods to make these children see in action what is appropriate and what becomes dangerous...I get so upset sometimes that the docs seem to think putting children on these drugs is the only way to get to them...I tried to get practical help for my son for 3 years but none was available...I would try the medications to calm his system down for a while but be sure you follow and have a say in the strength of medications given and get the autism team involved for an 18 year old your son has a say in his treatment or if his willing to try it out for a while, also try to get him involved in some sort of sport where he can get his aggression out on the pitch safely but with disapline...and teach him to hug softly showing him how much strength he needs to use...if you can try to work on his diet, cut down on his sugar intake, especially soft drinks, each can of soft drink contains 12 tsps of sugar, increase fruit, veg and add flax seeds to his diet and walnuts are suppose to be fantastic for the brain, as long as his not allergic to them...and most of all create a layer of thick skin for
    yourself;)P Good luck!
  6. pepperidge

    pepperidge New Member

    You didn't mention autism. Autism is not the only condition that leads to this behavior. It could be "simple" ADHD. It is also a totally accurate description of fetal alcohol behavior.

    Medications that people have found effective include stimulants, Tenex or its longer-acting variety, and low doses of Risperdal.

    We have seen improvements on medications--enough to outweigh the negatives we think. You won't know unless you try, but in our case the social damage and fear of stiuations exactly as you describe was enough to make us try. School is also doing some cognitive training too which helps. Part social skills, but part goal setting each day (like I will not poke anyone or I will keep a social distance or whatever) and evaluation at the end of the day.
  7. babybear

    babybear New Member

    I flipped through this book in our library just a couple of days ago. It looked like a really good book.

    A 5 is against the law! : social boundaries : straight up! / Kari Dunn Baron.
    Product Description

    Building on Kari Dunn Buron s popular The Incredible 5-Point Scale, this book takes a narrower look at challenging behavior with a particular focus on behaviors that can spell trouble for adolescents and young adults who have difficulty understanding and maintaining social boundaries. Using a direct and simple style with lots of examples and hands-on activities, A 5 Is Against the Law! speaks directly to adolescents and young adults. A section of the book is devoted to how to cope with anxiety before it begins to escalate, often leading to impulsive and unacceptable behavior. Throughout the book, the reader is encouraged to think about and create his own behavior on an anxiety scale that applies to his particular emotions and situations.
  8. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I'm not sure medications will actually address this behavior, while some sort of social skill therapy might help teach him personal boundaries, which seems from what you said is what he is having issues with would probably benefit him greatly. It doesn't matter actually if he is autistic or not. Many developmentally delayed kids aren't necessarily on the spectrum for atuism, yet may share some traits of the disorder such as a lack in social skills and personal boundaries due to their delay.

    My son Travis has a brain injury as well as autism. Personal boundaries/social skills were tough for him. We worked with him for years on this issue alone. We've seen vast improvement, but the issue is still there.......and honestly I think it will always be there. We tried medications for Travis once, it was an utter disaster, and we chose not to try it again.

    At 25 Travis can be in a room of people without invading their personal space. We literally would draw a circle around a person over and over again to show him that personal space. (imaginary circle about 18 in around a person) If he invaded that space we would have him stop, back up, then start again. This can be reinforced with family/friends too. We taught him to ask to touch someone as well. Why? Because he doesn't pick up on the social cues to know when it is appropriate or not. These two things alone help a ton.

    My grandson Alex is developmentally delayed as well......and at this point the autism part is iffy as he's not been offically diagnosis. But he too has issues with personal boundaries and social cues. And out of habit.......Nana and the whole family use the same techniques with him as we have for years with his uncle. It helps that his Special Education teacher is using the same method. I'm seeing improvement to some degree already.

    Practice makes perfect as well. We would practice social situations with Travis too.....where he could learn what was/wasn't appropriate in a safe environment.

    You know your son best. Ultimately you're the one who has to decide. But in my opinion while medications may help curb some impulsive behavior, they still have to be taught and practice social skills to be able to function to the best of their individual ability.