difficult child's day

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Wiped Out, Apr 8, 2010.

  1. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    difficult child's morning:

    *goes straight to computer when he isn't suppose to be on it.
    *upset with easy child so tried to squirt ketchup on her.
    *still upset with easy child took a screw driver and went at her.
    *I took away the screwdriver.
    *He was upset with me and tried to move me by wrapping his arms around me.
    *Took beaters (like you mix a cake batter with) and poked them on my back continuously. Started out thinking he was funny but, it wasn't and got more aggressive as I told him to stop.
    *Incessant drumming on everything to drive easy child nuts.

    difficult child's school day:

    *Manic behavior
    *Called a kid a fat, stinky, a**
    *Put his fists in threatening way in front of the student's face.
    *Put his fists in a threatening way in front of aide's face
    *With his chest pushed Special Education teacher to the wall.

    difficult child's day after school:

    *At my school didn't like the snack I had for him and wanted to go home (I was in a meeting with his case manager) so he slammed my classroom door shut loudly 3 times.
    *At home he threw an orange across the room at the window. Busted open the orange. He thought it was hysterical.
    *Threw basketball across the room.
    *Threw basketball at me.
    *Swore at me several times.
    *Off the wall manic; dancing around, not making any sense, again, he thought he was funny.

    Believe it or not I know I am missing some parts of his day.

    I just called psychiatrist on Monday and we readjusted medications. I'm thinking another call may be in order tomorrow.
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    ((HUGS)) I don't know of anything more I can say. I'm sorry.
  3. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    wow. Sounds like a day from hades. I hope they can do something to help, he sounds pretty manic.
  4. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sharon, hope you heard back from the doctor. Hugs.

  5. Sharon,

    Gentle hugs... I have a feeling that difficult child's day completely and totally wore you out. I hope the doctor did call.

  6. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Ugh!!! After all that stuff being thrown at me--I know what I'd like to pick up an throw across the room....

    difficult child is lucky he has such a patient angel for a mother!!!


    Hopefully, a medication adjustment will help!
  7. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    It would seem that husband needs to be dealing more with this sort of day. husband(and I assume you) appear to think that you and he can fix this child, with love, patience and tolerance. I don't think it is anywhere near enough. You will look back at all the hours and years wasted in the families life just trying to avoid physical assault and damage to property hoping that it will make difficult child realize he isn't being kind. Again, I don't think so.
    So maybe husband needs to be dealing with the aggressive, abusive behavior 90% of the time instead of you and easy child. Just my .02.
    I read about your days and I wonder how you can live every day like this, how the Special Education teacher can go to work everyday knowing that she/he will be assaulted and bullied by a youngster, how easy child can not be traumatized by living with this intimidating behavior. I know she is no true easy child but she lives in an abusive home and difficult child is the abuser. Granted he is mental ill but parents are supposed to protect all the family members and not just the sickest.
    Maybe this is the time for husband and difficult child to live separate from you and easy child for a few months. Just a thought.
  8. house of cards

    house of cards New Member

    Huge hugs for you. I wish there was more knowledge out there to help our kids. I wish it wasn't so much of a shot in the dark. I am praying some medication combo can give difficult child some self control and allow the sweet kid to shine through. The more I go through similar but not as intense things with my difficult children...the more I really hate drug abuse and what it does to these kids. You are a devoted mom and both of your kids are lucky to have you.
  9. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I'm worn out just reading about his day! Are the medications in your sig still up to date? For some reason I remember him getting Depakote in the psychiatric hospital. Maybe not... Yeah, a readjustmetn is definitely in order, unless they want him back in the psychiatric hospital.
  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I have to agree with Fran. difficult child is not safe for you and easy child to be around. Can husband use FMLA to change his schedule so he is there in the morning before school and afternoon/evening when difficult child is home? difficult child is abusing easy child, and you MUST stop it. If he hurts her and social services is involved you very well could lose custody of her.

    Please ask the doctor if difficult child needs to go back to the hospital. Or if he CAN go back.

    I am so sorry. I hope you can get some peace this weekend to recharge your batteries.
  11. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    K-Thanks for the hugs-they are needed and appreciated.

    CM-A day from Hades is a good way to describe my day.

    Sharon-I did hear back from psychiatrist-I'll update at the bottom of this post.

    Valerie-Yep it wore both husband and I out-probably his teachers as well.

    DF-Thank you for the kind words. I'm hoping the medication adjustment will help as well.

    Fran-You brought up some good points. I do feel more and more that if we can't get difficult child to a better place it may be time for residential. husband helps a lot. Most, but not all, of the aggression happens when he isn't home (on his way home from work) or when he is in another room (usually catching a break from difficult child who wants to be with him 24/7). When it does happen when he is there he does handle it. If he is in another part of the house he also comes to deal with it. Is our living situation the best? No way! We are doing what we can. Living apart wouldn't be economically feasible for us and with how easy child/difficult child feels about husband she would be crushed. We do try to schedule lots of time to do things with easy child/difficult child without difficult child (usually only one of us at a time). I really do value and appreciate your advice.

    Kathie-Thanks for the prayers. I, too, hate what drug abuse does to the kids.

    Gvcmom-Good memory-I do need to update his medications. He is on Depakote and off of Lamictal. He is also on the generic of cogentin (sp?). All the other medications other than the levothyroxine are correct.

    The psychiatrist's office called back. We are raising difficult child's Loxapine dosage quite a bit. If he isn't doing better by Monday he will probably be returning to the psychiatric hospital.
  12. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Susie-You snuck in on me. husband is there in the morning before school (he takes difficult child to school). Yesterday he was in the shower and getting ready when difficult child was at his finest. After school we could probably switch him waiting for easy child/difficult child instead of me bringing him home (definitely something we could arrange). It's some difficult child and me time that is often good (just not lately). As far as easy child/difficult child-she often purposely gets him going. She knows his fuse is short and loves to get under his skin-still it's probably from years of living with difficult child.
  13. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I just worry about your safety and the impact on entire family as he gets older and bigger and stronger and where this is leading everyone, including him, in the future. I wish there was some answer I or someone could give you to help.