Are there any other divorced parents working with their kids, while the ex is completely working opposite (in a not helpful way?) Our son is O.D.D., ADHD, possible Conduct Disorder. His father (my ex) doesn't believe any of this - even though the pediatrician, psychologist, 3 social workers, and therapist are all trying to explain to him its real and son needs help. Ex and I had an awful divorce and struggle to deal with MINOR things...let alone major things like this. NOTHING IS EVER EASY WITH US. Which likely doesn't help son. I'm trying to fix that. Our son was kicked out of one school last year, I had to go through a legal war with the school to keep him in the district where we live (the district dropped IDEA and IEP balls left and right, lots of broken laws), just move to a different elementary school. Ex didn't help at all. Not one penny. Came to no meetings. Offered no support, wouldn't even talk about our son's issues - just kept saying it was my fault and I shouldn't have him. So while battling the school (I won). I had to battle his dad (I won - son is now on medications and gets therapy, in addition to having an IEP/Supports at school to start helping him improve.) His dad filed an objection with the court - I have to go tomorrow. He wants son off all medications, to stop seeing therapist, to stop getting help at school, and to move school districts to one 45 minutes from my house. I really don't think that any judge is going to change things (I've got experts galore coming in and tangible evidence that son is improving. No way anyone will mess with that). But now that its summer, son spends more time with dad than during the school year. And the ENTIRE TIME he is there, its classic Disney Land dad. Stay up late, no rules, play games, etc....and run mom into the ground. He tells son all the time how our custody isn't fair (its the standard every other weekend deal, nothing crazy) and how I'm trying to alienate them. How I never let son see or talk to his dad (which is a lie), how all of these issues are my fault. And he tells our son every time we go to court, everything that is said. So the poor kid just hears how terrible we all are. Then, when its my time with our son, dad will call (its court ordered, I can't deny the calls right now) and drop some info about something fun son will miss, just to "set him off", then hang up and I get a full on raging kid losing it on me about how I'm awful. How I ruin his life, try to keep him from his dad, never let him have fun, and on and on. It happened last night and son won't let me touch him (like to hug), won't look at me, will barely talk to me (and when he does, its short and awful) all because dad called to say there's a birthday party for a friend this weekend by his house and son can't go since he's with me. Why tell him? Other than to make him mad at me. And I don't even have info on this party to even SAY yes or no! Tried telling son that, doesn't care. He's buying into dad's lies - hook, line, and sinker. I feel like I'm doing the right thing. I make have him chores and responsibilities. We have limits and consequences. I don't bad mouth dad, but I will be honest about his short comings (like this party thing, I told him "I understand you are frustrated. I would be too. I AM too. But I do not have any info on this party so I can't say yes or no - it is NOT ok to be disrespectful of me because you dad hasn't given us info. I'll try to get ahold of him today to find out."). I can't keep letting him talk like I'm the bad guy. I have to put my foot down to being talked to so AWFULLY by an 11 year old kid. But I KNOW that a good part of this is just him spewing the crap from his dad. Anyone else? I hope I'm alone lol but I doubt I am. How do stay sane and calm and not just lose it?