GuideMe, this particular forum is for people with children under 18 because it sure changes once they become legal adults. You may want to shoot over to Parent Emeritus where our children are over 17.
To answer, I have four adult kids and the youngest one is eighteen and still pretty active on FB,but she doesn't use it to get into trouble and only allows people she knows to be her friend. I think it's normal for teens to like FB. It's what they do with FB t hat can be worrisome. Does your difficult child still live at home? Can you tell us her story? We don't know much about herl, which makes it hard to give you support. Is she taking drugs? Disrespecting you? Becoming violent? Refusing school/work? In legal trouble? Who else is in your family? Do you live in the US or somewhere else? Help is different all over the world.
Yes and she still lives at home. I know she has a bipolar. I am bipolar as well. I feel so bad for her because , even though I had severe depression at her age, she seems to be worst at her age than I was. She smokes weed on a daily basis, can't even stop her. She has convinced herself that she is a pothead, something I think she got from my brother and his wife. Yes, her anger is the main problem. Violent when she doesn't get her way and doesn't really obey any of my rules. Comes and goes when she pleases, will be out all hours of the morning which is really hard on me. I am convinced that I am the problem and her living with me is not a good idea because she knows she can walk all over me. But no where else for her to go right now. She does have remorse for when she acts badly towards me, but she can't control herself.
Well, GuideMe, you have bipolar so you know she CAN control herself. Nobody who is bipolar HAS to smoke pot daily. It is very detrimental to treating our bipolar and screrws with our medications. I say "I" because I have a serious mood disorder too and would not be where I am now if I was drinking and smoking pot, thus taking away the good affects of my prescribed medication. Your daughter can also follow your rules. She is using her bipolar to get away with not doing so.Maybe she is worse than you were at her age because you had respect for your parents and she doesn't so she just is out of control, and it may have nothing to do with bipolar. I had it too and didn't act like her.
The best thing that halppened to me was that my parents just thought I was "bad" and didn't want me in their home so I had to leave. Why was that good? Well, I had to get well on my own and grow up and I did. It wasn't always easy, but I did know that this was my own problem and that I was the one who had to heal myself and keep and make my appointments and take my medication and I sure knew better than to do any recreational drugs or to drink. I knew that would only make things worse for me so I didn't do it. Your daughter doesn't have to do either either (that sounds strange for some reason...).
Living with you is a terrible idea, in my opinion. You let her smoke pot and live with you. That's a dealbreaker in my house. You let her get violent and blame it on bipolar and bet you don't call the cops. Any violence in my house and I am calling 911. Violence is not negotiable. And my grown kids have to work. It is also non-negotiable. Bipolar people can get stable and work and do all the time.
If it were me, she'd have a list of shelters, mental health centers, and luggage and have two months to either get with MY program in MY house or leave. difficult children are good at finding places to stay. Living with us does not cure them. It just makes us unhealthy so that we are good for nobody, not ourselves, not our other loved ones, not even for them.
Do you control yourself? Unless your daughter is so manic as to be psychotic, she can control herself. And if she took her prescribed medications without adding pot and alcohol to the mix, she'd be even MORE able to control herself. But she doesn't want to and you don't set any meaningful boundaries. Have you gone to any Twelve Step Meetings?