Hello, I am new to this site. I have 8 year old twin boys who are wonderful, intelligent, talented, funny, vibrant, and active. I had suspected at around three years old that there was a possibility of ADHD. Husband against medications, and I wasn't quite sure yet. pediatrician DR said definitely not, as do most people still, including my husband and his parents. Now that they're in third grade and problems keep escalating, family is finally considering the possibility. I took initiative to have them tested. difficult child#2 (younger of twins) was diagnosed ADHD. difficult child#1 didn't finish testing due to other reasons, but at first meeting ran out of building. (Not a good sign)
Now they are seeing a therapist who suggests all different things to take care of their behavior. They lack self-control, are impulsive, stealing from us (food, money), and can figure a way out of anything. They are super smart. (Together or seperate) So each suggestion we try, and it fails. I decided to set up appointment with P-DR (which is tomorrow) to diagnose them again and find out why they are doing what they are doing . . .
We've taken everything away from them. They don't play with toys. They didn't have TV for awhile, earned it back, and had it taken away again. Put alarms on doors - they dismantled in less than 15 minutes of them being up (and majority of the 15 minutes they didn't know they were there). mother in law wanted to seperate them, but this means pulling one of them out of current school (which we just started this year). I can seperate at home as far as bedrooms, but how do you control children without whooping them (and having them taken away for abuse) or discipline children who know exactly what they are doing wrong and still continue to do it. Consequences don't phase them.
difficult child#1 is having problems at school - all behavior related. Half of time he won't do work in class, and won't bring home either. It's too easy for him (we just moved into a new district but in same area). I feel like he needs to be moved to another school for gifted kids, but yet his behavior doesn't warrant this. He does well when he receives positive reinforcement (who doesn't - ), and when he feels needed and appreciated in the classroom. He has already had detention twice, and today makes the third time. We did a behavior plan, but he has broken that already also. difficult child#2 is having better year so far, but his mouth gets him in trouble all the time. Has already been suspended from Boys & Girls Club (BGC), and so has difficult child#1.
difficult child#1 tested my nerves today running out the house and down the street like he was grown, and telling me "NO". I called the police. Husband was at work, and I am tired of the disrespect.
I am caught between a rock because they know better - they can tell you what they did wrong and why. They can tell you what a better choice would've been. It's so difficult to understand why they can't do what they are supposed to, but yet realize that if they do have a disorder it is the disorder that is holding them back.
Had to vent. So frustrating to want to give them the world, but feel like you can't because their behavior doesn't warrant it.
Now they are seeing a therapist who suggests all different things to take care of their behavior. They lack self-control, are impulsive, stealing from us (food, money), and can figure a way out of anything. They are super smart. (Together or seperate) So each suggestion we try, and it fails. I decided to set up appointment with P-DR (which is tomorrow) to diagnose them again and find out why they are doing what they are doing . . .
We've taken everything away from them. They don't play with toys. They didn't have TV for awhile, earned it back, and had it taken away again. Put alarms on doors - they dismantled in less than 15 minutes of them being up (and majority of the 15 minutes they didn't know they were there). mother in law wanted to seperate them, but this means pulling one of them out of current school (which we just started this year). I can seperate at home as far as bedrooms, but how do you control children without whooping them (and having them taken away for abuse) or discipline children who know exactly what they are doing wrong and still continue to do it. Consequences don't phase them.
difficult child#1 is having problems at school - all behavior related. Half of time he won't do work in class, and won't bring home either. It's too easy for him (we just moved into a new district but in same area). I feel like he needs to be moved to another school for gifted kids, but yet his behavior doesn't warrant this. He does well when he receives positive reinforcement (who doesn't - ), and when he feels needed and appreciated in the classroom. He has already had detention twice, and today makes the third time. We did a behavior plan, but he has broken that already also. difficult child#2 is having better year so far, but his mouth gets him in trouble all the time. Has already been suspended from Boys & Girls Club (BGC), and so has difficult child#1.
difficult child#1 tested my nerves today running out the house and down the street like he was grown, and telling me "NO". I called the police. Husband was at work, and I am tired of the disrespect.
I am caught between a rock because they know better - they can tell you what they did wrong and why. They can tell you what a better choice would've been. It's so difficult to understand why they can't do what they are supposed to, but yet realize that if they do have a disorder it is the disorder that is holding them back.
Had to vent. So frustrating to want to give them the world, but feel like you can't because their behavior doesn't warrant it.