Good for hubby bad for me

worried mum

New Member
I feel strongly like my three and a half year old son has something wrong with him but when I think he is behaved for my husband but out of control for me it makes me wonder.
He has been out of control for hubby too but most times will stop mid track in a tantrum and do what my husband says.
For example, he was completely out of control screaming and on the floor and way off the planet like some animal when I called my husband and put the phone piece to his ear and he stopped completely and calmly said ok, ok, ok to what my husband was saying then got up and took himself to bed, he never sleeps when I want him to nap so I gave up but I really feel he needs a nap but refuses. He often wakes up in the morning crying whereas my seven month old wake up smiles etc, my son often cries at night too.
I often wonder if he has a tumor or something that is causing this behaviour as he had a head injury at birth by the obstetrician shoving an instrument down against his head that got him out of my pelvis during my c/section. He had a weird shaped head as a baby and big head in size as it was off the chart for his age, literally off the chart. I took him to a paed when a little babv who did no investigations as he was happy with his shaped head and as long as he had normal motor skills didnt want to see him again.
As a toddler he would hit himself in the head, if you told him off for anything or any discipline he would whack his head and with force.
Yesterday I told him off while he was tantrumming and he literally with all his might was punching himself in the face over and over. I was looking for bruises that is how hard he was hitting himself.
Today he erased my sons game on mario kart which I blame myself for not keeping an eye on him over and so told him off and told him to go to bed and that was it, full on screaming, he went to bed after seeing I meant it and proceeded to scream his stack off, I think the neighbours must think I am literally killing him and Im shocked no one has called the police or something for the noise coming from his bedroom.
I went outside and did some work and then came back inside to his still screaming. I am too worried to go in his room in case he is still awake and I have to deal with him but worried if I dont I will find the walls all drawn on and carpet like what happened last time. That granted was unusual but still its like he wont take my discipline without losing it but if my husband says something usually he will obey.
In the end I leave my husband to deal with him when we are out somewhere that it is important he behaves. I feel so much like he has something really wrong with him and cant put my finger on it. Im worried and feel like when he grows up he will ruin his wifes life. Im more worried how he will treat his wife one day than his happiness.. I am feeling quite sad that I am feeling so disappointed in him and just feel like I love him so much only because he is my son iykwim.
 
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