Got stuff together for attny today

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by klmno, Dec 20, 2011.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    She had asked for a copy of difficult child's IEP so I had to look for the original over the weekend- I knew where the addendum was but needed the original that the addendum goes with and that was still packed from the move a couple of mos ago. Then, I started a letter last night. At first I was just going to document what I was sending her, then I thought I should spell out what I've been told by PO/super re requirements for each placement they are considering for difficult child. IOW, a sentence on "if difficult child goes to group home" and bulleted requirements, then "if difficult child comes home", then bulleted requirements they've told me difficult child would have in that situation. Then, just in case it wasn't obvious, I bulleted my concerns and questions, such as "why would difficult child need MH treatment if living with me but not if in group home when they don't provide it or even have a licensed MH therapist there"? I thought this would make it easier for her when she calls PO. Also, she can then see if PO is changing his story again.

    Then, I went on to re-iterate the 3 reasons why Residential Treatment Center (RTC) was recommended for difficult child in the first place several years agao (such as him becoming aggressive with me after intense emotional things would come out in therapy) and mentioned that PO/super seem to think they would be giving me a privilege if they "allowed" me to take difficult child to a therapist, however, they have suggested that a mentor be provided and the mentor can talk to difficult child about becoming aggressive with me.

    Then, I mentioned again that I thought short term placement with family therapy to get the "worst" emotional stuff on the table and ensure we aren't in crisis mode, then gradual transition to home was in difficult child's best interest, short and long term.

    But since PO/super aren't even considering that option, I'd surely need an attny on board for whichever decision they make. If difficult child goes to long term group home, I want to seek release from juvie CSU requirements. If difficult child comes to live with me, I'll need an attny for different reasons, and mentioned those.

    Believe it or not, I got all that in 3 pages. LOL!

    I'm seriously hoping it becomes as clear to her as it is to me that something is wrong with this picture. If they think they are allowing a privilege for me to take difficult child to a DV therapist, or someone who can actually help with this problem, but they will have a 20-something mentor deal with difficult child about it?? And let's remeber, when difficult child even knows I told someone, it could cause aggression from him toward me. I get that many in the general public still don't understand that a wife who's being abused by a husband, for example, could get plowed by the husband if she even tells someone or reports him then he gets out of jail after one day, but shouldn't people in CSU 'get it' better than that? Anyway, I sure hope this attny gets it. She''s not one who just fell off the turnip truck so maybe she will.

    I figured I might as well get her informed about all this now because we are surely gearing up for (what round is it??) Round 4, I think.

    This letter will be what I modify to write a letter for all those outside of CSU that I want to 'inform'. I have to wait a few days though- this is emotionally draining.
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2011
  2. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    Good for you!! I sure hope the atty IS as smart as you hope she is. Wouldn't it be wonderful to live in a perfect world where other's best interests were ALWAYS put first?

    {{{{(((HUGS)))}}}} to you.
  3. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    KLMO, I'm proud of you. Yes it is emotionally draining. It takes hours to think through it. It brings up the old stuff. It brings back old fears and starts new fears. You are a true warrior mom. (((Hugs))) and more ((Hugs)) to you. Hang in there!