So back to grandpa issues. He needs more care and he just admitted it to my dad and wants me or at least him to spend nights again. My dad is extremely ill, cant lift at all and the stress level is just as bad with gpa as it is my son. My dad says hes going down, but this will kill my dad in the matter of weeks. My dad may also be in the hospital again soon as well, then what does gpa do? Now dad says he just wont go to the hospital when he needs to. So son is being his normal self and now I never want to go into a store or in public in this town again to say it mildly, daughter is back on strike because of braces issue. My sister is well my sister and all is the same which is no worse yet, but no better yet in her situation. My health, well, still gotta get to the Dr, yes still. Having health issues, barely can eat because of the acid reflux turned Dysphagia, (or similar we will see if i ever get to a dr) stomach and bleeding issues, stress, and, since Im barely eating( no, no exercising still) no weight loss ( thought I did but water weight?). And don't forget my teeth!! Least on the bright side my eyes are good. Certain Neighbors I "believe" are putting it in my gpas head that we, mainly I need to be there again as much as possible, all night period among other things. Because all of a sudden gpa is saying things how they would!!!!!!!!!!! What do they get out of all this? Starting to wonder!!!!!!! So, yes, Im just so confused, hurt, worried, tired. Now what? SomewhereOut There- you said and some others agreed, " I bet you dont know what peace is" No, no I dont. If kids are actually calm, something else is going full force, most times, its two or three things at once. It would be all my fault again if I collapsed from exhaustion/stress or health issues, I believe Id be blamed for that. Also to be believed is that if I had lived in a another town for the last ten yrs, that Id be the one called upon to care for gpa or everyone else even if my kids had same issues... Its like I have a sign inked on me that says" oooo oooo pick me pick me,even tho I have my hands full" But yet, to them Im all wrong, ungrateful, no good. No matter what decisions I make in life I will make most of the people mad at me, which I cant do anything about- Im learning that. Trying to. Im just not like everyone else, Im only me!!! Sorry all , needed to vent... and If I could I would have a snow cone, fountain sodas with an all you can eat buffet!!!!!! Then, id soak in the tub for two hrs and prune.. then, id have some one clean up after me and wait on me hand and foot for a few weeks!!!!!! Aww that would be great!!!!!!!