He tries to choke her !

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by dimhof78, Mar 18, 2007.

  1. dimhof78

    dimhof78 New Member

    My three year old has a history of stroke in the womb,seisures,small areas of brain damage. He is delayed in speech and development. He has what they think is sensery intergration, having trouble with large groups of people and transitioning from one activity to another. He has ODD. His body is rigid and doesnt like sudden movement or being lied on his back. He cries and whines alot. And has extreme agressive behavior which starts first thing in the morning. He takes Zyprexa because he couldnt sleep he rocked all night, complaining of pain through his body. His eyes were rolling around in his head while makeing repeated body movements. He constently is hurting his older brother or tormenting him in some way. He does these things mostly when he is bored but sometimes for no reason at all. Randomlly throughout the day he has disturbing facial expression of anger (he trembles) when Im holding the baby or even when its just him and I looking at each other. He wraps his hands around her throat and tries to choke her. He then see's if Im looking then pulls away becoming excited. He is absolutly Unstopable we have tried several disipline tactic. I cant leave him alone with either of my other children. He is agressive sometimes 10 times an hour. I feel like he lives in time out. We get wrap around two hours a day and I still cant take much more. My six year old is suffering greatly he can never relax. Please tell me Im not alone.
  2. Liahona

    Liahona Active Member

    No your not alone. I'm sorry you're and you're kids are going through this. My difficult child has tried to kill my other 2. With difficult child 2 he hit him in the head several times with a rock. He is still violent towards difficult child 2. Its just gone underground. When he thinks we're not looking. difficult child 2 screams whenever difficult child 1 comes into the room. And, yes difficult child 1 seemed to live in time out. Now he goes into time out does the time and comes back out like it doesn't fase him. He used to destroy everything he could get his hands on while in time out. I've had to make him my shadow. I couldn't trust him with the other 2 so he had to be in my line of sight at all times. To go to the bathroom after he got to old to take in with me I had to lock him in his room. There have been a few times when I'm about to lose it and send him to his room, so that I can have a time out.

    Who diagnosis your 3 yr old? What are they doing for the aggression?
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I'd make sure he saw a developmental pediatrician. He has some big red flags for many things that a regular pediatrician or therapist would miss.If this child has some sort of neurological disorder, likely he'll need early interventions and regular disciplinary methods won't help. It sounds like he has a lot going on and I'd want it checked out by the best possible professional. in my opinion it's not a psychiatric problem and choking the baby is very serious. Has he seen a developmental pediatrician for an evaluation? That's where I would start.
  4. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    What kind of specialists is your son being treated by? How about therapies--is he getting weekly occupational therapy? Children with untreated sensory issues usually have wildly ranging behavioral issues.

    I'll be honest with you that most children we've seen here who have both neurological issues plus behavioral issues like you are describing are medicated. Are you working with a pediatric neurologist or a child psychiatrist to find medications that will help this aggressive behavior?

    Also, because you are seeing speech delay, sensory integration issues, and transitioning problems it is important that your child be evaluated for Autistic Spectrum Disorders. We see a lot of missed diagnosis in early years, especially in children who are higher functioning. Also gets missed a lot when there are overlapping health issues that could possibly explain behaviors. Treatment, school placement, strategies used at home make a huge difference for Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids.

    I'm glad you are getting wrap around. Is your son in early intervention preschool?

    Pick up a copy of the book "The Explosive Child" by Ross Greene and read the thread at the top of this board.
  5. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Hi I just wanted to welcome you and let you know that you have come to a good place. I would take the advice suggested...
    My difficult child used to choke when she was very little but it wasn't out of anger it was more of a sensory regulation, she had no control over her boundaries, she still doesn't but is a bit better, she would grab other children and look like she was choking them, but she was trying to get close to them and hold them or hug them, without really knowing how or when to stop or how much pressure etc. She would end up scaring them and choking at times because she was so excited. It was so hard on her because she was excited and wanted to touch and be near others.

    We had to teach her "soft hands" and show her how to hold a doll and other things softly... she still gets excited and is overly agressive/touchy... We would also stroke her hands very softly to show her soft. We also had to do a lot of squeezing to her body for joint proprioception, she has a lack of connection to her joints and is unable to really feel how much pressure she is applying... These are all sensory Intergration disorder things.

    I don't know if any of this will help or if it applies, just a thought.
    Hang in there.
  6. dimhof78

    dimhof78 New Member

    Thank you for all your advice. We do see a phyciatrist who prescribed the zyprexa which took a lot of concerning things away and replaced them with behavior problems. He is not explosive, he is actually rather calm about his insanity. Although he whines and cries a lot, refuses to act his age or just is not able to. I fired all our wraparound and am gonna try a family home base program if anyone has had experience with that let me know how it went. Back trying to get through my day
  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I don't have any experience with home-based, and I guess this is an older post, because I answered it once before, but I'm wondering if he's seen a developmental pediatrician. He has a lot of, if not almost all, the symptoms my son had at three--from the violence to the rocking to immaturity. He has Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. Whether yours does or not, I have no idea, but Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) is a big symptom. You may want to take him to see a Dev. pediatrician. and have him/her follow him. Are you getting speech, Occupational Therapist (OT), PT? in my opinion, which could be wrong, this is likely a neurological rather than a psychiatric/insanity problem. He has quite a history...is he on anything for seizures? I'm not 100% sure, but I think Zyprexa may lower the seizure threshold. (My son was misdiagnosed with ODD first--he's on the autism spectrum, but it's mild so they didn't catch it until he was 11!!!) Good luck.
  8. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    I think I would be discussing different medications with the doctor.