Health Issues....


Well-Known Member
Well, I know I been saying Im gonna go, besides no money and scared to go and just havent wanted to be examined for other reasons for a while.. I have no choice now. I dont remember if I told yo all or not but I have HPV, the cancerous strain since I was pregnant with my son whos now almost 9 years old. I havent had a Pap since. I have had some irregular bleeding off and on through the years, bladder issues, chest pains( maybe just heart burn/panic attack) Acid reflux diagnosed by my sis.. ( when I took over counter medications it helped 100%) I almost now cant eat cuz it stays in the throat and comes back up. ( sorry) So now my pains I was had in my pelvis are spread to abdomen now lower part stomach. Add bad teeth and obese.Oh my pulse rate is high too.

So, I am taking the advice you all gave me before and am going somehow this week. Sometimes I hate my life so much I say who cares my ex said Id be dead at 50... well, overall, I dont want to die. I hope its all not to bad. Next week..I cant take the pain anymore in my stomach.. its like a almost constant twist and throb..sometimes quick light punch.. Just venting as usual and thank you all for putting up w me and responding to me in all my rants! Hugs all.

Scent of Cedar *

Well-Known Member
Sometimes I hate my life so much I say who cares my ex said Id be dead at 50... well, overall, I dont
want to die.

That you posted your ex husband's terrible words and then, posted immediately after them that you do not want to die is a very good indication that you may have reached a turning point, a place of good change in your life.

Prayers going up for you that this is so, and for strength and courage and gentleness toward yourself as you go about making these good changes.

You are stronger than you know. Be gentle with yourself; forgive yourself. For now, for this time, you will need to be your own best mother. It is okay to take time, it is okay not to know all the answers, it is okay to pause for reflection.

It is okay, and more than okay, to be mistaken. That is how human beings learn and grow and come real.

It is okay to hope, and to believe, and to change.

Are you able to set an intention of nurturing and healing and protecting yourself? Your husband was very wrong to speak to you as he did. It has taken you all this time to face his words down but you are doing it.

Whatever happened, whatever is happening now, you are a fully human being of immeasurable beauty and limitless potential.

Forgive yourself for believing the harmful things. Just let those old belief systems go, just for now, just for today.

Believe things can be different, can be any way you want them to be, and things will change. Through the force of your will, and through consistent, determined intent, things will change.


Seeing someone who can correctly diagnose any medical problems is excellent. I am proud of you for choosing to take care of yourself in this way. It sounds like it has been a battle to reach this decision.


Beginnings never seem as exciting when we begin them. But if we continue, every single thing in our lives changes.

Every single thing.

As our Seeking Strength always posts to us on P.E., stay close to the site during this time.

We are all right here.


P.S. I am going to try to post something from The Velveteen Rabbit for you.

I have to go find it, first.



Well-Known Member
I'm glad you are getting checked out. I had HPV and had to have a cancerous section cut out. It was easy for me and I was glad it was done.

Also, regarding the heartburn pain and feeling of it coming back up - make sure they check into your gallbladder. I had horrendous pain (which always let up after an hour so no going to the emergency room writhing and sweating in agony) and after a year of taking Nexium my doctor did an ultrasound and I was full of stones. I had my gallbladder out and no problems since. I wish you well.

Scent of Cedar *

Well-Known Member
Thanks. I needed that.

You know, I needed to read it again too, that day. It's funny how those things work. We think we are being helpful to someone else, and in the process, we find that exact thing that we needed ourselves.

Wishing all of us a bright, productive day.

I am listening to Pacobel this morning, as the sun comes up.