klmno
Active Member
there, but I think my mother might have sexually abused my half-bro when he was very young. I am trying to tell myself that there is nothing I can do about this, especially since my bro is an adult and we don't get along. At. All. Anymore. But, when I testified in court last year, even though I had always thought something was weird in my family- more than the apparent- I could tell by the judge and others that this doubt/thought crossed their minds as a possibility. That put a seed of doubt in my mind that I keep trying to push out but keeps coming back. The judge made a point to let me know that she wanted to make sure my son was monitored around my family- particurlaly my mother and had no problem when I said I didn't want difficult child around my bro anymore.
The memories I have are bad enough and point to "something" out of kelter going on in our house- maybe more than one issue- but I still keep having this feeling that there was something that I knew or saw or heard as a young child that I just can't remember. I know I was sexually molested as a teen by one person and that my bro also tried but did not achieve it. Also, it has always been an extremely dysfunctional family and every therapist I have seen that knows my history has been adamant that my mom MUST have been sexually abused as a kid. She has never confirmed that but has claimed that others have abused her in other ways- my father and me- she has always said I'm just like him, but I know that I have never abused her and don't know that my father did either. And, I just read a list of signs of sexual abuse and my bro showed several of these too- including memory loss. He swears that he can't remember anything before the age of 8yo. I had attributed that to our dad dieing then, but now I'm not so sure. Especially since I see other tell-tale signs he had listed on this list.
Iin court, this was such a concern that several of us had to get the GAL back on board to convince her that difficult child still has his own issues that need addressing and that the famuily history was not his bbiggest problem. Fortunately, all of us (me, the judge, even the MST guy) except the PO and GAL seemed to be in agreement of that. We felt difficult child does need to be aware of some of these things at some point in the future, but not right now since he does have his own set of issues- but when he does, he needs to learn about it and deal with it in therapy- not a court room and not just me telling him at home.
Do I just continue to push this out of my mind- I see absolutely nothing that I can do about it. But, of course, it bothers me.
I may have to delete this post later.
The memories I have are bad enough and point to "something" out of kelter going on in our house- maybe more than one issue- but I still keep having this feeling that there was something that I knew or saw or heard as a young child that I just can't remember. I know I was sexually molested as a teen by one person and that my bro also tried but did not achieve it. Also, it has always been an extremely dysfunctional family and every therapist I have seen that knows my history has been adamant that my mom MUST have been sexually abused as a kid. She has never confirmed that but has claimed that others have abused her in other ways- my father and me- she has always said I'm just like him, but I know that I have never abused her and don't know that my father did either. And, I just read a list of signs of sexual abuse and my bro showed several of these too- including memory loss. He swears that he can't remember anything before the age of 8yo. I had attributed that to our dad dieing then, but now I'm not so sure. Especially since I see other tell-tale signs he had listed on this list.
Iin court, this was such a concern that several of us had to get the GAL back on board to convince her that difficult child still has his own issues that need addressing and that the famuily history was not his bbiggest problem. Fortunately, all of us (me, the judge, even the MST guy) except the PO and GAL seemed to be in agreement of that. We felt difficult child does need to be aware of some of these things at some point in the future, but not right now since he does have his own set of issues- but when he does, he needs to learn about it and deal with it in therapy- not a court room and not just me telling him at home.
Do I just continue to push this out of my mind- I see absolutely nothing that I can do about it. But, of course, it bothers me.
I may have to delete this post later.
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