LittleDudesMom
Well-Known Member
...don't want to jinx it now...
but I think difficult child is really making some forward progress.
We had a conversation Sunday evening. I told him that I was having an IEP meeting this week to make sure things are straight for high school next year (did I say that? is littledude really going to high school?). One thing we would be discussing was Mr. S., his 1:1.
I told difficult child that there were really three options here. 1 would be to stop cold turkey, as of the IEP date. 2 would be tapering - he would be in the building, there if needed, and then eventually 1/2 days, etc. 3 would be to taper him somewhat, but keep him in place for the first month or so of high school (which is what I really thought he would choose).
"I want to know your thoughts on this difficult child. This effects you, not me." (although it has been a fabulous support and "mind-easier" for me the last five years).
"Well, I'm going to be sad because I will really miss Mr. S., but I want to go to high school on my own. Mr. S. and I are already doing that tapering thing, mom. Remeber we talked about it before (I mentioned it to him in the fall) and he doesn't stay in my classes the whole time. He does come to art because he likes to do what we are doing."
Is this really my stubborn, pattern-stuck difficult child? The one who wants everything to always stay the same. Who balks when I change his sheets because I put different ones on? Who doesn't like change?
I spoke with Mr. S. yesterday afternoon. He says, that since he began keeping an incident log, at my and difficult child's therapist's request in October, there has only been one incident and it did not call for his intervention. difficult child told Mr. S. in science class one day that he needed to get away, he went down to the nurses office for 20 minutes to chill and then returned to class on his own. He knew his frustration was building....
Mr. S. believes difficult child can do it. difficult child believes he can do. It will be good enough for me at this point.
Mr. S. and I agreed that we would not allow the team to put a time line or difinitive date for removal. It should be open-ended, "upon the students needs". Don't want someone coming in and saying, "well, it's April 10th, 1:1 is gone as of today."
I think it's a good plan. We will also include the necessity, in the IEP, that difficult child have a permanent "pass" to leave the classroom and go to a "safe place" when he feels it is needed. That way it's in the IEP next year when he begins high school. He will find a safe place, he always does. Probably the nurse's office - he seems to charm those nurses!
Anyway, just wanted to share what, for me, was a moment of maturity for difficult child. As always, I will hope for the best...it's that optimist thing...
Sharon
but I think difficult child is really making some forward progress.
We had a conversation Sunday evening. I told him that I was having an IEP meeting this week to make sure things are straight for high school next year (did I say that? is littledude really going to high school?). One thing we would be discussing was Mr. S., his 1:1.
I told difficult child that there were really three options here. 1 would be to stop cold turkey, as of the IEP date. 2 would be tapering - he would be in the building, there if needed, and then eventually 1/2 days, etc. 3 would be to taper him somewhat, but keep him in place for the first month or so of high school (which is what I really thought he would choose).
"I want to know your thoughts on this difficult child. This effects you, not me." (although it has been a fabulous support and "mind-easier" for me the last five years).
"Well, I'm going to be sad because I will really miss Mr. S., but I want to go to high school on my own. Mr. S. and I are already doing that tapering thing, mom. Remeber we talked about it before (I mentioned it to him in the fall) and he doesn't stay in my classes the whole time. He does come to art because he likes to do what we are doing."
Is this really my stubborn, pattern-stuck difficult child? The one who wants everything to always stay the same. Who balks when I change his sheets because I put different ones on? Who doesn't like change?
I spoke with Mr. S. yesterday afternoon. He says, that since he began keeping an incident log, at my and difficult child's therapist's request in October, there has only been one incident and it did not call for his intervention. difficult child told Mr. S. in science class one day that he needed to get away, he went down to the nurses office for 20 minutes to chill and then returned to class on his own. He knew his frustration was building....
Mr. S. believes difficult child can do it. difficult child believes he can do. It will be good enough for me at this point.
Mr. S. and I agreed that we would not allow the team to put a time line or difinitive date for removal. It should be open-ended, "upon the students needs". Don't want someone coming in and saying, "well, it's April 10th, 1:1 is gone as of today."
I think it's a good plan. We will also include the necessity, in the IEP, that difficult child have a permanent "pass" to leave the classroom and go to a "safe place" when he feels it is needed. That way it's in the IEP next year when he begins high school. He will find a safe place, he always does. Probably the nurse's office - he seems to charm those nurses!
Anyway, just wanted to share what, for me, was a moment of maturity for difficult child. As always, I will hope for the best...it's that optimist thing...
Sharon