You've already gotten some great advice here... I just wanted to add one thing that jumped out at me when I read your first post...you really seemed upset and concerned that the teacher's e-mail somehow was questioning your parenting skills and morals.
I really didn't see much wrong with the teacher's e-mail. Rather than try and talk with you in the chaos of the hallway (and without much privacy), she sent you an e-mail that summarized things that had happened over a week's time. The first week of kindergarten is a hard transition from kids, and teachers shouldn't jump on something when it happens the first day as the kids are adjusting. But she's communicating to you that there are some serious problems that go beyond the usual adjustment period.
Also, from your post, you indicated that your daughter has had serious behavioral issues and has been to several specialsts. I understand why you chose not do disclose that to the school, but it also meant that they had no ability to prepare or deal with your daughter in a way that might accomodate or address those issues ahead of time.
I hope your meeting goes well and you and the school can work together to help your daughter succeed in kindergarten.
ETA: I forgot to finish my first thought.... I felt the same way, too, when the teachers and counselors at my son's preschool told me that they thought he was autistic. I felt like a bad parent, and that they were judging me. It's a real shock to the system sometimes to hear these things, but just reading your posts.... you are a great parent and are doing your best for your daughter.
I really didn't see much wrong with the teacher's e-mail. Rather than try and talk with you in the chaos of the hallway (and without much privacy), she sent you an e-mail that summarized things that had happened over a week's time. The first week of kindergarten is a hard transition from kids, and teachers shouldn't jump on something when it happens the first day as the kids are adjusting. But she's communicating to you that there are some serious problems that go beyond the usual adjustment period.
Also, from your post, you indicated that your daughter has had serious behavioral issues and has been to several specialsts. I understand why you chose not do disclose that to the school, but it also meant that they had no ability to prepare or deal with your daughter in a way that might accomodate or address those issues ahead of time.
I hope your meeting goes well and you and the school can work together to help your daughter succeed in kindergarten.
ETA: I forgot to finish my first thought.... I felt the same way, too, when the teachers and counselors at my son's preschool told me that they thought he was autistic. I felt like a bad parent, and that they were judging me. It's a real shock to the system sometimes to hear these things, but just reading your posts.... you are a great parent and are doing your best for your daughter.