icandothis--Intro Thread

[SRL]

(Welcome Connie! I copied your post into your own intro thread--it's fine there but you'll usually get more/better responses to your first if it's not buried within another thread)

hi there,

wow, my story is nearly ditto. i am totally new to these forums and have no idea what the abbrevations mean. can you give me the down low?

anyway, my 4.5 yr old was diagnosed with sensory issues at 18mos. she went to Occupational Therapist (OT) for 18mos. and was dismissed. all was much better. then we moved to a new home, locally, and 9mos. later we relocated out of state. still no notice of any poor behavior at school. she only act out to me, dad and her older sister (sent to me from above). we have been in corp. housing for 10mos. in an area where we know no one. i was struggling with the move. i was isolated and without a community. needless to say, my 4.5 yr olds behavior went terribly south. i just thought it was some sensory issues popping up again, but the tantrums, the arguing, the destruction of things and physical aggression just worsened. i behaved so poorly, feeling desparate exhusted from trying to find a reasonable solution to get her to respond any form of discpline. i resorted to screaming, saying things i totally regret. i am so embarrassed by my immature behavior.

my older daughter and my relationship is totally suffering and including my relationship with my husband.

he is so very patient, but he feels i have just not stood my ground with her so therefore, i have created a brat. i know this is not true.

i know you are looking for answers, as am i. but i feel validated by your email. i know i did not create this monsterous behavior.

we are going to get her evaluated on wed. maybe i will have some insight for us both.

connie
mom of 2 girls 8 & 4

 

[SRL]

Sensory issues rarely stand alone so if you are seeing behavioral problems (even if not at school) along with major transition problems I would recommend seeking out a complete reevaluation. Schedule an appointment with her pediatrician and ask for a multidisciplinary evaluation with a developmental pediatrician or pediatric neuropsychologist, Occupational Therapist (OT), and if she has any speech differences at all (delays, trouble answering questions, echoing, adult sounding speech, not connecting with other kids socially) then you will want speech as well. A lot of peds will blow off a parent request at this point saying she's just having a hard time with the move but I'd push it.

What are her play behaviors like? Does she play well with other kids? Have unusual or obsessive interests? Do any lining up of toys in lines or formations?

Get a copy of Ross Green's The Explosive Child and read the thread at the top of this board for behavioral help. It makes a difference for many kids but it's no substitute for finding out what's really going on.

 

[icandothis]

Thank you, thank you for connecting with me. my daughter speech seems fine, although processing expressive and receptive speech seems disconnected.

her behaviors include constant interruptions, combative, arugmentive, defiance of rules, destructive tendencies and physically aggressive mostly to her sister. the destructive tendencies scare me the most because i feel she has done it on purpose.

i will not let this rest. she is being seen on wed. and i will pursue every avenue. i just hope and pray that we catch this in time to prevent any other social disorders developing.

connie
mom
4.5 with sensory
8 difficult child

 

[BusynMember]

Hi there. Has your child ever had a complete multidisciplinary evaluation (MDE?)
I would recommend this to get the most extensive sort of testing for a child of her age. It may be impossible to know what is going on when she is so young, but at least a complete evaluation can point out the child's problem areas and address them. Also, check your family tree for psychiatric/neurological disorders or substance abuse. Often things are hereditary.
Kids who act out usually have some sort of disorder fueling the behavior. I would check not rely on a pediatrician or plain therapist or psychologist to check it out--in my opinion, they don't test enough.

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

Hi Connie,

Just wanted to pop in and offer my welcome. You have already received some good advice, and I am sure more will be along during the week. This is a safe place to be and I hope you find comfort here.

 

[Liahona]

Just wanted to add my welcome and I hope her evaluations help.