IEP meeting today

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Kjs, Oct 13, 2009.

  1. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    I was afraid they would say he was no longer in need of services. But they didn't. When all done, they said how he can benefit from services.

    He was in there and I pretty much said nothing. They spoke mostly to him. He was very laid back, relaxed, polite and honest.

    There was some lady in there I didn't know. She had something to do with career goals. he is a Sophomore and needs to start planning for the future. (lol - he doesn't plan for the day)

    He said some interesting things that I didn't know.

    He always went to a large school. Always a disaster. Last year we chose a college prep school. They start with college credits Junior year and they are transferrable. (this is a choice). They have "career tracks" You choose which career track you want and they tell you what to take.
    Example: Biomedical, information technology / web design/networking, Automated manufacturing - CAD, Aeronautics... You must pass with a C or better. Last year he was in the info tech track. He got a D+ and a C. They would not allow him to continue in that track unless he "re-took" the pre-requisite with no credit. (right). So he is in the Automated manufacturing tract. He likes it. Programed machine to drill holes in this metal block. But, he also took honors Biotechnology last year.

    Anyway, when they asked him what his goals are, what he wanted to do..he said "graduate". That's a good goal, but what do you want to be ... He"I want a job where I don't have to do anything"....hahahaha. The social worker said there would be a long line for that. Then he showed extreme interest in culinary arts. He helped prepare and serve food for banquets and the prom last year. He also said he would love to be an Emergency room nurse or doctor. (haha - anxiety???) They asked him to volunteer at the hospital. (he never comes out of his room) He replied - "yeah, but there is so many sick people there, I might catch something". Then he said he is NOT a cubicle person. He wants hands on. He is very good at multi-tasking, not good at "sit down and do this". He said he would really like to be a 4th grade teacher, and help kids like him. 4th grade was the worst, and we switched him to a very strict teacher. They hit it off and that lady made the biggest difference in his life. She was by far the very best teacher he ever had.

    He fought with me about going to this school last year. He wanted to go to the district school a block away. (3000 kids vs 300) All the kids he knows go there. His school is a nerd school...You can get away with more at the big school, it is easier at the big school...All his reasons.

    Well, he is correct. It is easier. He doesn't get to pick his electives, he chooses a career tract. However he has the option of taking classes at the big school. Which he is doing this semester. He takes the bus from his school to the big school after lunch and has his last class there. Chemistry. He said today that he hates it. Hates his teacher, hates the class. Teacher said he is very bright and understands the concepts.
    difficult child said that he LIKES this school, likes all the teachers and is glad he is there. Said he would not like to go to the large school and even though all his friends are there he knows he would get in a lot of trouble.

    He has not gotten in any confrontations or trouble this year. MY view on this is....every year at the large schools he had numerous teachers. He would always push their buttons and see how far he could push them. Last year, his freshman year he tried that, but was put in his place. This year he knows all the teachers and all their expectations. Teachers interact with the kids SO much. Even would meet them there on weekends to help them one on one.

    I said very little. He said how any ADHD medication he has taken does not agree with him. Especially ritilan. That makes him feel very angry. Adderall put him to sleep. He requested extra time on the State Tests because he has trouble getting started. And he doesn't do well when under time limits.
    that was granted.

    He will NOT take the State tests with the rest of the Sophomores. He will be in a small group in a conference room. Less distraction.

    Says he is bored, that is why he doesn't do homework. ???

    He has an A in a class that he really doesn't like the teacher. Well he said he doesn't dislike him but would never go to him to talk as he does with other teachers.

    He has pulled it together and is controlling his anger/frustration. Knows what to do. Working on anxiety. He did very good expressing himself.

    I was surprised he wants to be a teacher. A 4 year college is his plan. And he asked to take the Pre SAT's. His state test scores have always been beyond proficient. All the way to the end of the chart. It could not go any higher. Now, if he JUST DID homework. Oh, he said he ENJOYS staying after school to do his work. He doesn't like to do it at home. I guess I learned a lot today. Sorry so long.
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Wow, that sounds like a VERY good meeting for him. It's great that they asked for his input, and he certainly gave it! :) The smaller, more structured school was obviously the best decision you made for him. I think many of our kids do better in environments like that. My difficult child 1 sounds a LOT like yours...

    Glad that they are giving him the accommodations he's asking for, especially as it relates to tests. Your difficult child has a lot of personal insight -- that's a good sign :)
  3. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    That sounds like my fantasy IEP meeting! He really gave you tons of insight - now you have to start looking into scholarships! lol!

    Congrats - you really must have enjoyed HEARING that he felt you did the right thing putting him in this school - I remember how much you agonized over the whole thing!

    Well done warrior mom! You never gave up!


  4. ML

    ML Guest

    I'm so happy to hear about this conference. How fantastic that he has come so far.
  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Thank you so much for sharing this with us!! I remember how you worried and wondered about putting him in this school. How much he fought you, everything.

    You made an excellent choice, Mama. Your Mama instinct were right, as they tend to be!

    This is what an IEP for a high school student SHOULD be. It rarely is, so this is awesome!

    Both difficult child and the school personnel behaved very well. That alone is amazing. To have difficult child tell you so much about his wishes, plans and desires is awesome!!

    Now you get to start looking for ways to help him plan for college. NOT to plan it for him, but to help him with the process.

    Are the PSATs the same as the PreSAT test? It was called the PSAT when I took it and it made a HUGE difference in scholarships for me. IF you take tests well and you plan ahead you can do wonderfully on this and on the SAT and ACT. There are books and quiz programs to help prepare for the tests. They can make a huge difference.

    I am glad things went so well at the meeting and that difficult child was so mature in handling their questions. He is really growing up and maturing well.

    You did a great job, Mama!
  6. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    That sounds like a really productive meeting. I liked how he made his smart-alec remarks but they used these to pull him back in track ("if you want a job where you dont have to do anything, there will be a really long queue for that.") He is having input and getting sensible feedback in response. This is exactly what he needs - to be helped, himself, to find his own way in life.

    He will discover that he needs to put in effort because otherwise hewill be ored. and the sense of achievment he will feel form completing a tricky task, will give him a bigger high than any amount of work avoidance.

    Sounds like he's on the way to getting it.

  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What a great iep meeting. Your difficult child is really showing some signs of maturity! Hugs to you!
  8. lizanne2

    lizanne2 New Member

    Great IEP meeting. Well done Mom and son.