I went for my physical today. It's been probably five years since I've had the complete exam. The nurse practitioner was really good, and while I was answering her questions, I started crying, and I'm not a cryer. I fell apart Sunday after bra shopping, and again today in the doctor's office. I could really relate to the article Kitty posted...I don't want to go anywhere, do anything...and while part of me is tired of it, another part just wants to go back to bed. I'm fat, I hurt, I can't sleep well at night, I'm frustrated, I'm upset, I'm PO'd... She asked if Paxil was helping, obviously not, so I now have Effexor XR. I also have a list of tests, like thyroid and blood sugar, and I go back in three weeks. I feel better now that there's a plan in place. I canceled two appointments before this one. I guess I wasn't ready to deal with things at that time.