Today I'm in a serious funk. It started yesterday with the 504 that really seemed like a difficult child bashing session. It just felt like his teacher can't stand him and is upset at us because she has him. Lastnight I was talking to husband about youngest difficult child. Just about how different he is from our oldest difficult child. That our oldest difficult child was really difficult at this age, but youngest difficult child seems 10 X harder. I always feel bad talking to husband about how I feel when it comes to difficult children, because they are biologically his and not mine. I love my difficult children, but somedays I'm just so exhausted emotionally from dealing with all the crud that comes with them. My youngest difficult child is my most difficult and some days I just feel like I'm failing. My oldest difficult child still has problems, but his and my relationship has changed so much over the years, for the better. I just don't see this happening with youngest difficult child. Some days I feel like he hates me, well, most days. I don't baby him and that's what he wants because before he lived with me, everyone babied him, bio mom, husband and grandparents. I feel guilty that he puts me in a funk. I feel guilty for all the things I don't get done because I just don't have the energy to do them. On top of all the stress of the new school, new teacher and 504, we are so broke right now. My husband makes good money, but we just paid our attorney $2400 last Friday, then our two 5th graders camp $ was due today, another $420, then my daughters preschool, which between supply fees and tuition was about $450 and all of this at the first of the month when the house payment is due and car insurance etc. All of our credit cards are maxed out right now, our new van is a killer payment, we make another car payment too. Bills are my responsibility to deal with and the stress between life and them is just really bothering me. When I stress, my stomach gets upset, so I don't feel well on top of it. Sorry ya'll! I just needed to vent. I'm in a funk and I need to just get over myself! We all have troubles and mine are miniscule compared to most. Today I just want to crawl back in bed, which will just make me feel further guilty because I'm not getting anything done. I need to pick myself up by my boot straps, but I just don't have the energy.