I find myself at times being very jaded. I don't really like it but I also realize it is probably a self protection instinct. Sometimes I come on here just to remind myself that I need to protect myself in a healthy manner from difficult child and even easy child when she is being irritating. Hearing some of the harder answers here helps me to realize that I am doing better with this and while I don't consider it a game I will win I do consider myself a better player. The problem I have is that I tend to start to distrust everything or shut down completely in order to get away from the issue. It is much harder for me to stay in the moment and deal with the situation appropriately. On the other hand some times I come here and feel like people are way too jaded. Yes my kid has issues and yes she is a pain in my bumpkis but she isn't a drug addict, homeless, severely mentally ill. Will she turn out that way I don't know but I also dont plan to spend my life expecting the worst or predicting the worst. It is easy to sit on here and make judgement calls. It is easy to think that we know what is going to happen because we have seen it happen so many times before. The problem is that with all the members we have it is hard to keep track of who's kid has done what and other little things that define that child. It's easy to forget the difficult child we are talking about is not our own. I have to stop myself at times from replying without taking the difficult child and the parents into account. My gut reaction to my difficult child doing x,y, and z is acceptable for my difficult child but might be totally inappropriate for someone else's difficult child. My jaded side comes out takes over and writes a post that offends and honestly once someone has been offended they tend to turn off a bit or tune out the advice. My advice might be right and their difficult child might fall right into the trap BUT if I can't deliver that advice in a way that is helpful it is wasted. Taking the jaded out of my answers can be difficult and there are times where I don't succeed. Anyway I guess what I am trying to say is that sometimes the harshest action is not the first course of action. The jaded response is not always the most accurate. Last but not least its best to take and give advice with an open mind. All of which are lessons I have learned and hope to pass on when I can.