Just dropping in

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by KFld, Aug 13, 2009.

  1. KFld

    KFld New Member

    Hello everyone who remembers me. I wanted to drop in and give everyone an update, though there isn't anything really huge going on, and just let you know I still think of all of you often.
    Maybe I should be posting this in the watercooler, but this is where I always posted most, so I knew I would find most of the people who would remember me here.

    I'm doing well, still dating the guy I have been with for a little over a year. I can't believe that it was 2 years ago my ex and I separated and ended our marriage. Sometimes it seems like yesterday, sometimes it seems like forever. Anyway, the guy I'm seeing is great, respectful, funny and I'm still just taking it slow enjoying life.

    My son, ex-difficult child/easy child???? sometimes I still wonder :), is doing o.k. He has been clean for almost 3 years, though still on methadone (switched from suboxone to methadone not to long ago!!). He has an apartment with his girlfriend (not wingnut, for those of you who remember wingnut) and he works and kind of pays his bills. I feel like this is the way he will live forever, but at least he stays out of trouble and seems happy with his life. I harass him constantly to come off the methadone, but you know how that goes!!

    easy child daughter is driving me nuts right now. If you remember her boyfriend got in a serious car accident a little over 6 months ago which resulted in brain surgery, the whole bit. He just had his final surgery 2 days ago where they replaced the piece of his skull that they had to leave out after surgery until all the swelling was gone, which took longer then it should have, because his doctor went on sabatical (not sure that is spelled right). easy child quit working as soon as he was released from the hospital, while everyone else went on with their lives, including his parents and family, she became his care taker!!! I have had an awful time pushing her to work, resume her education, just basically move on with her life. My grand mother had left her money for school when she passed away and I have recently realized that she and her boyfriend lived on it for the last 6 months and probably doesn't have anything left for school :(
    I know things could be much worse, but this is a girl who had so much ambition, goals and plans for her future that have been put so far aside, that I worry if she will ever get back to them. Her boyfriend has made a 90% recovery so far, expected to be 100%, so I'm praying he goes back to work now that his surgeries are over, and then she will resume her life again.

    Anyway, I need to get back to work. I did do some looking around to see how all of you are doing. Looks like some have made progress and others are still struggleing. I will always remember what a supportive place this was to come to when my life was not in a good place and I hope you all find that support here from each other.

    I'll try and check back in soon, or more often.

    Take care
  2. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    Hey there! I was thinking about you recently....weeeird! LOL

    Glad to hear difficult child/easy child is doing well! AND with no wingnut in the picture!!! :whew:

    As for your daughter....I think she's got a good head on her shoulders for the most part. Maybe this is just a slight detour. And maybe a sign thay you may want to start thinking of her boyfriend in a more permanent light???

    Anyway...glad to hear things are well with YOU also. Don't be such a stranger!
  3. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Karen, great to see you.

    Glad to hear that difficult child/easy child is doing well. 3 years clean is a HUGE accomplishment.

    As for your easy child, this is the age when girls lose their heads over their guys. I think Stang might be right in that this one might be around for a while. Your easy child has always been grounded and level-headed. Maybe this is a detour that she needs to take before she gets back on course.

    As for you and the guy you're seeing, I'm so happy for you. It's wonderful that you're in a relationship with someone who treats you well. AND that you're taking your time to enjoy it.

  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Karen....hey! So great to see you! How is that trash can? LOL.

    The kids sound like they are doing well. What can you say? They are young adults with minds of their own. I do hope easy child's boyfriend improves all the way. Glad he has come so far. 6 months is really quick with brain injuries.

    Dont be a stranger!
  5. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Karen---great update. Glad things are going well with difficult child. Well, as well as they can go with a difficult child. Luckily, daughter is a easy child---she will bounce back---but in her time. Glad the new relationship is still going well. You sound good...happy...and that's of utmost importance.
  6. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    Sounds like you are really doing well. Good for you.
    Hope easy child finds her way back to her goals.
  7. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Hey K.....

    (Must start out by saying Janet stole my thunder) lol. - about the schmancy trashcan - but I'm proud to say I got one of my own. :tongue:

    I too was thinking about you the other day and I'm just as weird as Mstang. :laugh:

    I'm really glad that you came back and posted. Did you know Trinity is having Twins....today would be good. It's my birthday. :anxious:;)

    Wondered what happend about the boyfriend - I wasn't surprised to hear she stuck with him. A little disappointed to hear she didn't move on with her life, but she has the same steady tenacity as her Mom!:D;) It's a good quality to be sure.

    So you and the fella huh? WOW - two years. :redface::tongue:

    Good to hear from you - and of COURSE we remember you.

    Take care....come back often-er (spelling could be off on that).

    Hugs & Love
  8. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Hi Karen, I just was checking around the site to see how my friends were doing and saw your post. I'm glad you are well and that difficult child is still clean. I hope your easy child eases out of caregiver mode and back into goal oriented mode soon. I have found that because I gave away so much of myself to others I inadvertantly taught my easy child to do the same. I am gently trying to re-teach her that she needs to consider herself and her needs consistantly also. She is relearning how to balance self with helping others. Your easy child is a smart young woman I am sure whe will figure things out also. Thanks for the update. -RM
    Last edited: Aug 16, 2009
  9. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Long time no see, my friend. I'm delighted that your life is steady again. As usual ;) I have a bunch of quick questions....not about your trash can!

    How's your Dad doing? Did he move? Find a new companion?
    Are you still living in the same townhouse? Do you have a new roommate? Any new fundraising ideas coming from your Club? Has Ex remarried?

    That's enough for now, lol. That will update me for a year or so! :D DDD
  10. KFld

    KFld New Member

    Hi DDD,
    my dad is doing good. Thanks for asking. He moved to the Villages and has made some new friends. There is one women he seems to spend a lot of time with, but I think they are just good friends???? Not that I would mind if it was more, in fact I think it would be great.

    I am still living in the same place and will probably be there until next summer. Then I think I'll start thinking about what I want to do as far as buying my own place as I'm just renting there. No new room mates :) boyfriend and I talk about living together someday, but not yet. I think that will be part of living arrangement decision next summer. We will either get a place together, or I'll buy a place of my own.

    Today is actually the 2 year anniversary of mine and my ex's seperation. It is his birthday today and I told him on his birthday that I knew he had a girlfriend :)


    I think I answered all your questions?? I'll have to go back and look and reply again if I left anything out.
  11. KFld

    KFld New Member

    See I did miss something. No ex has not remarried. In fact he tells people he will never get married ever again because he will never give another women his money ever again. He's still wacked. He is still with the same girl he's been with for almost 2 years now and she lives with him and puts up with his **** because "she's just crazy about him". She's crazy alright :) Crazy for staying with him. Better her then me!!
  12. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Way To Go, my old friend. :D You're taking it slow and easy. DDD