Just got a diagnosis

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by loricbme, Jan 18, 2008.

  1. loricbme

    loricbme New Member

    After working on getting an appointment. with a children's psychiatrist since last July, we've had two appts. this month and got an initial diagnosis of ODD/ADHD. I'm not surprised but it's great to have a confirmation of what I suspected and to really get the wheels turning in the right direction to help difficult child.

    husband, difficult child's teacher and I each had to fill out questionaires ahead of time and I thought it was interesting that when I compared all three of our questionaires we were all pretty much on the same page. I think that's a good thing. We'll get a full report in a couple of weeks. difficult child's teacher wrote a two page note about things that happen in her classroom and how they're handled. How difficult child interrupts her class a lot. How she is impulsive with the other kids physically and verbally. How she is argumentative about almost anything. How she has seated difficult child next to several different kids and finally had to seat her next to her own desk and how it is very unusual for that to happen in first grade. How at conferences three other parents commented to her about difficult child and how she is with their children. That was a tough one. There were other things but you get the jist. The thought of medication concerns me. I just don't want her to be drugged up and to lose her spark. However, I want her to get along with other people, especially kids, and to make and keep friends. I struggle with this. We did not go home with a prescription but go back in a month. I know they would like to try Ritalin. Also, they mentioned that they will continue to observe her for a form of autism that relates to the behavioral side. For the life of me I can't remember what it's called. They don't think she has it but will continue to monitor her.

    It's been awhile since I've posted but still think of this forum frequently. I called my mom today and told her what the doctor said. I told her that I don't talk about this very often with anyone. It's just hard to talk about it with people who don't understand. People who you think are your friends yet you can see the look of judgement on their face when they look at your difficult child. I sure have learned a lot through this journey and expect to learn a whole lot more.

    Thanks for listening. :smile:
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Hi! I just wanted to offer some support! It sounds great that things finally are moving in the right direction and that you are in agreement with the teachers. Hopefully, this will help your difficult child and get some supports in place. Don't be surprised if the diagnosis changes- remember it's only a label! The main thing is that everyone is working on finding what is the right answer and it's moving in that direction. It probably would be a good idea to continue with any suggested testing- if you're like me you'd always wonder otherwise. As far as medications, that's a hard one- I tend to think that as parents, we have to go by our gut instinct and weigh what the docs are saying and what we think is best for our child. I don't put too much weight on what people outside of that realm say when it comes to whether or not my difficult child needs medications. It's a tough call-- People on the board here are very helpful with potential side effects, experience they've had with certain medications, etc. But whether or not to start them- again, it's a tough call -
  3. luv my ottb

    luv my ottb Member

    Our daughters sound like twins. Mine is now 10 and experienced just what your has in her earlier years schoolwise. High spirited, charismatic and has others say she could be the first woman president or Satan's sidekick. If you could only harness that energy for the positive!

    difficult child has adhd with odd and medication has certainly made her easier to live with. The first day on medications she could concentrate long enough to read an entire story book and we were shccked and amazed. It is a very personal decision to put your child on medications, but as klmno has said the folks on this board are very kind, supportive and non judgemental.

    Glad to hear you are getting your child help and welcome Good luck to you.

  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you have something to work with-now. I know how you feel about being judged. been there done that. Sigh.
    We were very worried about medications, too, and tried everything b4 going to a stimulant, but it has been such a wonderful change it has been worth it. I never, ever thought I'd hear myself say that! Start with-a very low dose and trial it. Also, most ADHD medications only stay in the bloodstream a very short time. I think that is really what did it for us, knowing how quickly it would go through the kidneys and liver. Our difficult child has never lost his spark.

    Best of luck. Let us know how it goes.
  5. Amber

    Amber New Member

    Hi, I'm new here, but when I read your post I thought "that could be my child!" (She defies all description but one: MUCH loved!)
    The things you have said about your child could be applied to my own from birth, and she is now 12yrs old. It's good that you have gotten feedback from the teacher at this stage, and I hope that the teacher can continue to give you feedback at regular intervals on this.
    If there is one thing I have learnt in this journey with my daughter, it's to listen to my instincts and follow what my heart has told me. In the end it's not about what other people want, its what is best for your child.
    We followed the p-doctor's decision on putting our child on Ritalin and that was followed by a huge cabinet of other drugs over a 4 year time period; we have since come to regret every single moment of that. Research every single medication they want to put your child on - even if the dr assures you that its the best option, or its totally safe look into it on your own. Ask if it reacts with other medications. If you experience any problems that you feel are not worth the benefits, ask your dr for something else. Don't be afraid to fire the dr!

    When in doubt get a second opinion. If all else fails, dig your heels in and demand better then what is offered. It's for your child's present as well as future that you are working toward.
  6. loricbme

    loricbme New Member

    Thanks for all your replies! It really helps knowing that someone out there gets it!
  7. doubletroublesma

    doubletroublesma New Member

    You just described my son! We just got a diagnosis of ADHD/ODD last week, like you its nice as a parent to finally have that confirmation and now exactly what I and my husband are now dealing with. I suspected the ADHD and was on the fence about the ODD because I thought "hmm thats alot for a little kid to deal with". However the more research I did the clearer it became that the ODD was a strong possibility.

    My son is 5 and in kindergarten, the specialist told me he really dosent like to medicate until grade 1, and I am very hesitant about medication period, he suggested Omega 3 fish oils, and I have read and been told that caffeine in very small doses has a calming effect on ADHD persons.

    I will try anything at this point, I have had him on 3 Omega 3 capsuels a day since last Thursday and two small cups tea, I have for the past 3 months on my own modified his diet and cut out lunch meats, white breads, he refuses to eat white rice because he says it makes him feel not good. They never got alot of sugary treats or pop, so no worries there, and we dont have junk food in the house.

    We over the last couple of days have notice a significant change, now I know that the fish oils takes at least 3 months to build up in your system, maybe its the caffeine, and the modification in diet?

    We have had two awesome days, and by that I mean he has not been in any time outs, which was a daily occurance that resulted in him being in his room at least 1/2 of every day in total. The impulsive outbursts of swearing, and name calling, hitting and punching and overall defiance has subsided to a degree, but again I will take anything.

    Most days would start with him getting up and no lie ususally in a time out within minutes of being up for hitting his sister, swearing a string of profanity at his father and I, he has no rest until everyone is up, has to be louder than anyone or anything, can't grasp the simpliest concept of a board game, most days would result in me going to bed at night in tears, and him in his room kicking the walls and swearing up a storm.

    The specialist suggested and we have been doing it is to give him choices, small something as simple as "what coulor cup would you like" goes alot easier than "here is your water/milk" and him pitching a fit and dumping it on the floor and throwing the cup because its not the colour he wants.

    He will stare down the any adult and basically tell you "you want somethin done, do it yourself".

    I do notice that on the evenings he does not get his nighttime cup of tea he does not sleep well during the night.

    Sorry this is long, I am just so relived to have a diagnosis and found this support board.
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Glad you got in to see a psychiatrist. That is a big step, and a tough one for parents.

    I strongly recommend that you see a child neurologist and get a sleep deprived EEG. Many here recommended it, apparently it used to be standard medical practice to do this BEFORE medicating a child. It is not the standard now, but it is still a good thing.

    If we had not insisted on the EEG, we would never have known my daughter has Absence Epilepsy and she would still be having major problems.

    Anyway, be prepared for the diagnosis to evolve and change as your child grows. I think most of us here started out with the ADHD diagnosis, and lots had the ODD diagnosis along with it. You truly are NOT ALONE.

    medications are a very big, very personal decision. I have been told that ritalin and adderal are in the system quickly, and processed out of the system rapidly. Usually if it works you will see it within 1 dose. First time my difficult child took adderall it was about an hour before a soccer game. The coaches for both sides, the kids and many parents noticed a BIG difference.

    Now he says with-o the strattera he would be useless. I guess what I am saying is that giving ritalin or adderall a chance might give you a quick view of whether this type of medication will work for her. It is fairly easy to stop - no weaning that I know of. But, as I said, this is a big decision best made by you, her dad, and your instincts.

    If your instincts say this is wrong, then don't do it. We have finely tuned instincts aimed at helping and protecting our children. I made my biggest mistakes when talked into NOT following my instincts.

    Hugs and support (no matter what you choose!)

  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I think you should get a neuropsychologist evaluation as well. They are very intensive, far more than filling out forms. They really tests our kids for hours and hours.
    I'm guessing that the Psychiatrist means Aspergers Syndrome. The best person to figure out if that is what's going on is, in my opinion, a neuropsychologist (shock!) I really believe that they are the best diagnosticians. And I've seen them all!!! If you are hesitant about medications, I'd get a second opinion first. My son was at first diagnosed with ADHD/ODD, put on stims, and they made him mean and aggressive. Why? He didn't HAVE ADHD/ODD. It was a misdiagnoses. He is on the Spectrum, diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified. School/community interventions were magical for him. medications, no. Good luck and welcome :)
  10. loricbme

    loricbme New Member

    You know, I think the thing I have the hardest time with is that difficult child doesn't bounce off the walls. I hear girls don't tend to do it like boys. But she is so impulsive. So argumentative. These days we get through our days better by using good manners, I call her sweetie or sweetie pie. It smoothes things over and she doesn't get as bad or have her moods last as long. She can sit down and read a book (when I'm with her). We don't really fight about homework (I know, I'm lucky on that one but she is only 7). She is very bright and makes great marks in school. There's a part of me that is going back into denial mode. I know I won't go all the way back but why am I talking myself out of it? I know what is there. I have lived with it for the past 7 years. Does anyone else ever do this?