lost it this morning

[miche]

The baby didn't sleep again last night. I've been up since 11pm -- got about an hour of restless sleep. So my fuse was short to begin with.

difficult child got up on the WRONG side of the bed this morning -- as is most days. She woke up crying and whining right of the bat. We ignored her until she cooled off. Her main problem was that the baby got up before her, and she wanted to wake her up, I found out later. So she cried and was completely defiant the entire morning -- she wanted us to carry her around and we both refused because we had to get ready for work and she started screaming and kicking and hitting me. The whole morning was a fight.

She had a major temper tantrum because I packed the lunches without her help (I asked her twice, she said no twice) then she refused to go to the bathroom, brush her teeth, or put her shoes on (or let me help her do it). Finally, I got fed up. We were late (again) and I just picked her up and put her in the car, without shoes, without brushing teeeth, etc. She really freaked, then. By this time the baby was screaming completely. I lost it. I took her out of the car, swatted her behind, then put her in the living room.

I told her that I was going to take the baby to school and I was going to work and she could just stay home by herself. I told her that I didn't like her anymore :frown: and that's how I felt. I told her that I don't like it when she hits, hitting hurts and it is mean, and that I didn't want to be with her when she acts like that. I know I shouldn't have said it, but I just lost it completely. I went out and started the car and opened the garage door. Of course, she had a complete breakdown, finally brushed her teeth and got in the car.

Cried the whole way to school and had a tantrum as I tried to leave there.

 

[SRL]

I'm sorry Miche, these are really hard days when you have a challenging preschooler plus a baby. difficult child was 2.3 when I had my 3rd plus I had a 5 year old. I probably averaged 5.5 hours of sleep for about three years though.

My difficult child had chronic crankiness syndrome frequently in the morning during his preschool years. It was before I knew anything was up so we blamed it on this or that but looking back I know it was his inflexibility associated with his neurological issues. One little thing that didn't go as planned or as he expected and WHAM! our mornings were killed. I'm an at home mom and being flexible with our schedule helped a lot. I also found that on bad mood mornings I could head him directly to a show with breakfast and a lot of times he would have regained his stability by the end.

Hang in there--it will get better.
SRL

 

[miche]

She was fine while she was watching Mary Poppins for 10 minutes. That's about it. I'm so worn out, and my students are on my last nerve already.

I think what makes it worse is that husband and I NEVER get a break. We live 3 hours away from our families, and do not have a babysitter. They're in daycare from 7:30-3:30 each day, so I'll be damned if I'm going to spend more time away from my kids. It would just be nice once in a while to do something together or get a 1/2 hour break. And on top of everything, my sisters just don't get it -- they had my mom to watch their kids whenver they felt like it. They had lots of breaks. If they didn't sleep, grandma took the kids for a while or for the night, even. It's really hard to get someone to come down to watch ours. Sorry for the vent.