Marguerite
Active Member
When the site got changed some time ago, friend requests were made possible. Now, I don't do Facebook or anything like this. You wonder why I am on this site as much as I am? It's because I'm nowhere else in cyberspace.
So when people began "friending" me, I happily clicked "accept". But the problem is, what happens next? What are the advantages? Disadvantages?
Of course I'm not a total ignoramus about these things. I have heard some of the ethical debates such as "my new boss wants to be my friend on FaceBook, I'm not sure I want that level of intimacy with my boss but how do I politely refuse?"
Then there is the marvellous song by Kate Miller-Heidke (Aussie singer). Don't look this up unless certain four letter words don't bother you. Google the singer's name in double quote marks then "are you kidding me?" without quote marks. And you will understand... and laugh, if the word doesn't bother you.
I already had a number of friends, some of whom are old, familiar avatars and others much newer contacts, when close together three new members asked to "friend" me.
Now, I didn't want to discourage them. But I didn't want to enter into something I didn't fully understand and didn't want to slow me down in other ways, either. So I waited and thought. While I waited and thought, these new contacts vanished from the CD scene. NOW what do I do? Every time I log on, there are those "manage your friend requests" blinking at me, making me feel guilty. What if they still lurk, waiting for my response, to know they're loved? Or maybe that is an arrogant thought. I'm not Lady Ga-Ga, collecting friendships like gun notches.
So today I finally decided - I am no longer accepting new "friend requests". This doesn't mean I don't want to be your friend. If anything, what it means is, you are all my friends and I don't want to discriminate. Any of you can PM me any time.
For those of you who are on my friends list - if I seem unresponsive, don't take it personally. I haven't a clue how that side of things works (or if it does anything).
So I finally declined those incoming friend requests. I suspect most of them are long gone anyway and won't notice. I did try to PM them to explain, but I figured this was perhaps a better way. I can tell everybody. Save time.
And as I looked over my list of friends, I noticed some particularly surprising absences, people I love to bits and who have corresponded with me privately. You know who you are. No, don't rush to 'friend' me. It can't increase how I already feel about you.
So for me, the membership list is my new friends list.
One final request - would those few of you who know my real name, please do not use it when you post publicly? Not all messages to me personally, are private!
And I will try to do the same.
oops...
Marg
So when people began "friending" me, I happily clicked "accept". But the problem is, what happens next? What are the advantages? Disadvantages?
Of course I'm not a total ignoramus about these things. I have heard some of the ethical debates such as "my new boss wants to be my friend on FaceBook, I'm not sure I want that level of intimacy with my boss but how do I politely refuse?"
Then there is the marvellous song by Kate Miller-Heidke (Aussie singer). Don't look this up unless certain four letter words don't bother you. Google the singer's name in double quote marks then "are you kidding me?" without quote marks. And you will understand... and laugh, if the word doesn't bother you.
I already had a number of friends, some of whom are old, familiar avatars and others much newer contacts, when close together three new members asked to "friend" me.
Now, I didn't want to discourage them. But I didn't want to enter into something I didn't fully understand and didn't want to slow me down in other ways, either. So I waited and thought. While I waited and thought, these new contacts vanished from the CD scene. NOW what do I do? Every time I log on, there are those "manage your friend requests" blinking at me, making me feel guilty. What if they still lurk, waiting for my response, to know they're loved? Or maybe that is an arrogant thought. I'm not Lady Ga-Ga, collecting friendships like gun notches.
So today I finally decided - I am no longer accepting new "friend requests". This doesn't mean I don't want to be your friend. If anything, what it means is, you are all my friends and I don't want to discriminate. Any of you can PM me any time.
For those of you who are on my friends list - if I seem unresponsive, don't take it personally. I haven't a clue how that side of things works (or if it does anything).
So I finally declined those incoming friend requests. I suspect most of them are long gone anyway and won't notice. I did try to PM them to explain, but I figured this was perhaps a better way. I can tell everybody. Save time.
And as I looked over my list of friends, I noticed some particularly surprising absences, people I love to bits and who have corresponded with me privately. You know who you are. No, don't rush to 'friend' me. It can't increase how I already feel about you.
So for me, the membership list is my new friends list.
One final request - would those few of you who know my real name, please do not use it when you post publicly? Not all messages to me personally, are private!
And I will try to do the same.
oops...
Marg
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