My 2 years and 9 months boy is hitting his younger sister and all other kids!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by abboodeh, Jul 19, 2013.

  1. abboodeh

    abboodeh New Member


    (this is going to be a long story so bare with me please)

    My name is Abdullah, I am married since 3 years, we are living in Kuwait, while all our families are back in Jordan, so we are living all alone with no close relative in our country where we live.

    God gifted us with a very hyperactive boy, his name is Rayyan, he was born back in 3rd of Nov. 2010 (now he's 2 years and 9 months) he doesn't talk yet, well he says few words sometimes he says a sentence of 2-3 words like...whenever someone enters the room he would say (hello sir)... when he wants to eat or drink he would ask for it but he understands whatever we say to him, sometimes he listen and obey us, and sometimes he doesn't....ohh mentioning eating... he doesn't like to eat at all, he would not even try to taste the food! forcing him to taste something (whether it's something he likes or something new) he would close his mouth and after we let go of him he would cry wipe away what;s lift on his lips! but he loves chicken, specially KFC! but we don't offer him KFC on daily basis because fast food is not healthy, we take him out once a week...
    if we tried to fool him by wrapping up home made food so that it looks like we bought it from the outside he would know it! and then again refuse to eat...he likes to eat fries as well and canned Tuna.

    He loves playing with his Ipad, he can navigate thru applications and open up his favorite game (talking Cat Tom) it's a game where whatever sound you make the cat will repeat it in a funny way, so he open up that game and start making sounds and listen to the cat repeating it...and sometimes he would try to invent new sounds to see how the cat will repeat it, like moving chairs and tables making a noisy sound.

    He also likes puzzle games in the Ipad, whenever we download a new puzzle game we just show him how to solve it and then he would play it alone (by puzzle i mean for example solving a simple puzzle picture...moving shapes..etc)
    Aside from the Ipad he likes to play with blocks (Lego)

    We are still bottle feeding him, 2 bottles of milk a day, one essential before he sleeps and sometimes when he is very naughty during the day we give him a bottle of milk he loves milk!

    He doesn't go to nursery, we take him almost every week to play in the park, where he interacts with other kids, he play with them normally.

    He walked too early when he reached 10 months i guess, his 1st tooth came a bit late just before he started walking, now he has full teeth.

    in 9th of Aug. 2011, god granted us with a daughter (her name is Taleen), since the day she was born he turned out to be aggressive, he hits her a lot,sometimes he's like hugging her but he do it so tight that she starts crying and of course we split them up.

    it's always been like that, we can not leave him with her alone, he will take any chance to go and push his sister, we tried talking to him, again sometimes he listen and stop but then after few minutes he would run to her and push her on the ground, when she started crawling he became more and more aggressive towards her, he would push her and sit on her, sometimes he would scratch her too!

    We talk to him, giving him time outs for 2 minutes, we take his favorite toy (iPad) as a punishment, he would cry a little he understands that this is a punishment, he would then go play then after a few minutes he would come again and hit her!

    Now she started to walk, he doesn't allow her to do anything!whenever he sees her he push her and of course she starts to cry, we hold her up but she doesn't like it, she wants to walk play like any other child at her age...

    Last month, we went on vacation back to Jordan, where his uncles and aunts are with their children who are older than him in at least 5 years! we thought that when he's in a very crowded place he would forget his sister but we were **** wrong! he started to pick on other kids and hit them, push them ... so it's not only his sister it's all other kids doesn't matter if they are older or younger than him!

    what should we do? besides being an embarrassment in front of everyone when he hits other kids, it's also a big problem for us that he is still hitting his sister...

    at early age when she was infant whenever he used to come close to her to prepare to hit her we would scream (Kiss your little sister) he would listen and kiss her, then we clap for him he feels happy and dance a little but then he either keeps kissing her, choking her or he would go play with something else then back very fast and hit her...nowadays the "kiss her method" is not working like it used to be, specially when he is hitting other kids...

    what should we do...please give us a practical solutions, i don't want some fantasy nice advices that doesn't work in real life, i want something really helpful....

    We are thinking of taking him to a nursery but yet we are so **** afraid that he will be a big trouble for the other kids there...

    Your help is highly appreciate it.

  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Hi there and welcome :) Sorry you have to be here though.

    I will try to help. I am not at all familiar with your healthcare options in Kuwait so I will do the best I can to help.

    I don't think this is a behavior problem, although I know it looks like one. I think your son may be a little different than other children. This does not mean he is bad or hopeless. It just means he needs a different approach to parenting. Perhaps he is sensitive to loud noise or big crowds or tags on the backs of his shirts or the feel of his socks. Maybe he has certain obsessions and does things over and over again and doesn't even know why. That could be part of why he feels the need to push children who are walking. There is a lot of help for this, but I am not sure of where you would go to get help in your country. Maybe start with your child's doctor? Don't let the doctor tell you he is just being a boy either. This is not just being a boy. Insist that he send you to somebody who can help your family and your child.

    I really hope this helped a little. Others should come along, but the weekends are always slow.