I'm new here and I have been struggling with my 5 year old since she was 1.5 yrs old. It started with tantrums so bad I dreaded grocery shopping days. It has now escalated to defiance so bad she looks at you and does exactly what you tell her not to right after you say it, even right after negative reinforcement or punishment. I've tried everything. Positive reinforcement, negative reinforcement, punishment, redirection etc. Nothing works. I started her in therapy last year after we had two incidents with animals. One where she was fighting with her older sister and looked at her and said "this is what you get" and stomped on our elderly cats back. The other where my friend was watching her, had her sitting at the table eating, the dog jumped up to her lap, she stabbed the dog with her fork (Not hard enough to pierce the skin, she was 4). When asked why she does these things she responds with "I don't know." She doesnt seem to feel remorse. When you explain how she could have, for example, killed the animal or what damage could have been caused she seriously doesn't care. The scariest part is that she exhibits a lot of traits of her biological father, who isn't around enough to influence behavior. It must be genetic. I've been told that it would very rare if her father is of the antisocial category for it to be passed on to her, but they are too alike to deny. She has a fascination with knives. Whenever anyone uses one in the kitchen she says weird things like "Don't cut me," "stay away from me with that," or she'll talk about cutting people and blood. In fact, at random she'll bring up knives and blood. We are a very loving family. No violence. I constantly stress using words not your hands (or feet) to my kids. I talk to her about things. She knows she made the wrong choice and she knows what she could have done differently and still chooses to hit, or defy. I know the impulsive hitting can be apart of ADHD, which we are scheduled to get the results on January 10th. But the waitlist for the child psychologist to evaluate for conduct disorder is so long, her appointment is the end of May. I've tried oils and homeopathic regimens. I know she knows how to be a good girl. She's smart, but she just chooses the bad behavior most of the time. I'm at a loss. I just want to help her and I don't know how. I'm honestly scared for her. I'm afraid she'll end up in a psychiatric ward.