Need input on idea for a plan for easy child 2

[Shari]

easy child 2 is really testing her easy child status.

Her mom emailed me last night and actually asked for help. I didn't tell her what I really wanted to (which is you made this bed, enjoy your nap!)

In addition to her grades falling thru the floor, easy child 2 has been sneaking, stealing, and lying at her mom's, too. And now that her mom is finally catching her, its a problem. She's been "grounded" from tv and video games for 2 months. Tv is only grounded from watching by herself or chosing the shows. She's allowed to watch it if someone else has it on. We know she's been sneaking the video games, as well, and she's finally been caught doing it at her mom's.

The punishment seems to be doing NO good. She doesn't want to go to tutoring, and won't ask her teachers for help.

Today, I had a thought. To make a reward/punishment point system based directly on her work each day. She has homework in her core classes almost every day. For each homework assignment she has she can earn, for example, 15 minutes of game time for an a, 10 minutes for a b, 5 minutes for a c, lose 5 for a d, lose 15 for an f. Time would be calculated every day based on her grades that day. Any form a deception is an automatic loss of the day's privelages. Tests and bigger projects can count towards weekend time. Maybe if she had incentive to do better ion her work, she'd start asking for the help she desperately needs.

Of course, we'd have to come to an agreement of what deception means - for EVERYONE - too.

Any thoughts?

 

[gcvmom]

Definitely better to make the consequence and reward immediate like you've outlined.

And it definitely won't work if you don't have ALL the adults involved cooperating to the letter.

 

[Shari]

I'm continuing to think on it, but I may suggest it. I may also offer to pull her grades daily as I have easiest access to the computer thru the day, but that will be the extent of my involvement. Someone will else will have to coordinate adults and dole it out - that part won't be me.

I agreed to stay in my "role" after our chat last week, but I won't take on any extra til I see that the ah-hem .... adults.... in this picture are gonna act like they are. husband can work it out with his ma, her mom can work it out with other grandma, and I will tell easy child 2 that lying is lying, if I'm the one that catches her lying, no matter who told her to, I will tell her preants. Period.

 

[amazeofgrace]

hmmm that's a tough one. Loss of all privaledges is a tough one, all my inhomes always advised loss of one privaledge per incident/error

 

[ML]

I really like the plan and I'm proud of you for insisting that the other adults do their part!