Hi, I am new here, and I am so desperate to know if my DS's behavior is normal/typical for his age. My son is almost 4, and has been a difficult child since birth. As in infant, he cried non-stop, and was never a happy baby. He was always constantly irritable. He just wasn't one of those babies who smiled and laughed a lot.
He is still the same. I feel like 95% of our day consists of trying to keep him satisfied. If things aren't like he wants, the whole family is MISERABLE. My 5 year old daughter gets the short end of the stick, because we have to spend a lot of our time trying to keep our son settled. I feel like a horrible parent for saying this, but I've always felt like something was "off" with him. Autism, Aspbergers....something like that has often crossed my mind.
I've had him evaluated for behavior (he didn't talk until he was 3, and went through speech therapy), but he managed to behave while they were around. The person doing the evaluation said she didn't see any signs of anything but typical behavior. I didn't necessarily agree. If he doesn't get his way, he just EXPLODES!! Nothing really violent, just screaming and tantrums. He isn't physically abusive, other than hitting/kicking at us when he doesn't get his way.
Typical behaviors for him are:
-Hitting, screaming (he has speech issues, so most of what he says is hard to understand, so he screams), crying a lot during the day, not able to interact/play with my daughter without a tantrum/screaming about something, VERY picky about food (has to be certain brand of.. lets say..mac n cheese, nuggets), will NOT share, and does not care at all about the other person's feelings. It's like he has NO concept of empathy.
He can be fine and in a good mood....UNTIL....Then, whatever you are doing is OVER!!!! There is NO negotiating with him at all. It is ALL or nothing with him. You can't make him be in a good mood once he gets started. He stays in a funk for longer than I think is normal. You can't use rewards/prizes/charts, with him at all. He does not care about working to get the reward, just anger when he doesn't get it. For instance, while potty training, I bought a little prize that he wanted. I told him that if he went on the potty, he could have it. I had to endure him crying/screaming/tantrums because I wouldn't just give it to him. He wouldn't accept the fact that all he had to do was use the potty to get it!
I don't know what to do anymore!! I just love him so much, and I want him to be a HAPPY kid!!! The wonderful times when he is in a great mood are amazing! When he is in a good mood, it's not long before something sets him off.
Sorry this was so long. I just want to see if this is typical behavior, or not. ANY help would be so much appreciated!!! My husband and I just don't know how to discipline him anymore!
Kelly
He is still the same. I feel like 95% of our day consists of trying to keep him satisfied. If things aren't like he wants, the whole family is MISERABLE. My 5 year old daughter gets the short end of the stick, because we have to spend a lot of our time trying to keep our son settled. I feel like a horrible parent for saying this, but I've always felt like something was "off" with him. Autism, Aspbergers....something like that has often crossed my mind.
I've had him evaluated for behavior (he didn't talk until he was 3, and went through speech therapy), but he managed to behave while they were around. The person doing the evaluation said she didn't see any signs of anything but typical behavior. I didn't necessarily agree. If he doesn't get his way, he just EXPLODES!! Nothing really violent, just screaming and tantrums. He isn't physically abusive, other than hitting/kicking at us when he doesn't get his way.
Typical behaviors for him are:
-Hitting, screaming (he has speech issues, so most of what he says is hard to understand, so he screams), crying a lot during the day, not able to interact/play with my daughter without a tantrum/screaming about something, VERY picky about food (has to be certain brand of.. lets say..mac n cheese, nuggets), will NOT share, and does not care at all about the other person's feelings. It's like he has NO concept of empathy.
He can be fine and in a good mood....UNTIL....Then, whatever you are doing is OVER!!!! There is NO negotiating with him at all. It is ALL or nothing with him. You can't make him be in a good mood once he gets started. He stays in a funk for longer than I think is normal. You can't use rewards/prizes/charts, with him at all. He does not care about working to get the reward, just anger when he doesn't get it. For instance, while potty training, I bought a little prize that he wanted. I told him that if he went on the potty, he could have it. I had to endure him crying/screaming/tantrums because I wouldn't just give it to him. He wouldn't accept the fact that all he had to do was use the potty to get it!
I don't know what to do anymore!! I just love him so much, and I want him to be a HAPPY kid!!! The wonderful times when he is in a great mood are amazing! When he is in a good mood, it's not long before something sets him off.
Sorry this was so long. I just want to see if this is typical behavior, or not. ANY help would be so much appreciated!!! My husband and I just don't know how to discipline him anymore!
Kelly